Dilema should I rehome Star?

[StarandBratsmom]

Hey everyone. It's been awhile since I've visited here, I hope everyone is doing great. Alot has changed for me, I got married last summer, and now I am pregnant and due to have my daughter in July. Star has been with me pretty much the whole time.

Star is about 6 years old, and I've had her as a kitten. She's my kitty child and I am very attached to her and she's attached to me. She's been an indoor/outdoor kitty for awhile. We got rid of her litter box because she is house trained, like a dog. She scratches at the door to go outside to potty. Then she comes back in. My dilema is for the last few months, my husband keeps getting an allergic reaction to something. His mouth or around his mouth will swell up. We have no idea what from. So the doctor mentioned that cats are the number ONE reason for allergies and asmtha. My husband has both but he tolerates Star (he loves her too, tho he won't admit it.)

So to help this allergy, I put Star outside and not allowing her inside. It breaks my heart because she stares in the window meowing to come in for cuddles with Mom. I visit her outside to help the transition, give her treats, but in the back of my mind, I worry sick because of outdoor dangers. It makes me cry, of course Im hormonal because Im pregnant. I am also alone during the days and Star has been about my only companion. Nothing like purrs and head bumpies to cheer you up. Anyways, since she's been outside, she seems off. Kind of depressed. I hate seeing her like this. My next thing is since she is a cuddler, and sooo very friendly, will she harm my baby? She's quite hefty and I fear she may want to be sweet to my baby and accidently harm her. So being outside seems logical in two ways. Other than her being so sad, will she get over it? My mom who lives pretty far has offered to take care of Star, but she'd only be an indoor cat which is great except my nieces live with her, she hates my nieces, she runs from them every time she hears them, but she's so laid back once they catch her. My mom will no doubt love her and spoil her the way I do, but I will miss her. Just thinking she may have to go, depresses me and makes me tear up, but what should I do? What is best for my husband, my baby, and for Star? What should I do?

[Grace]

Tell your husband to get tested - to be absolutely certain he is allergic to the cat.

As for Star - if someone you loved for years suddenly shut you out - wouldn't you also be "off"? I sure would.

Congratulations on the pregnancy. Please don't buy into those old-wives tales. I know many, many people who had cats before the kids were born, and not a one of them ever had any problems.

The final decision is up to you.

[JustineNYC]

Tell your husband to get tested - to be absolutely certain he is allergic to the cat.

As for Star - if someone you loved for years suddenly shut you out - wouldn't you also be "off"? I sure would.

Congratulations on the pregnancy. Please don't buy into those old-wives tales. I know many, many people who had cats before the kids were born, and not a one of them ever had any problems.

The final decision is up to you.

THIS.

Everyone told my mom I would be allergic to the cats or they'd smother me or whatever. Her cats didn't go near me once. And my dad cleaned the cat litter while my mom was pregnant.

Please don't rehome your cat. Children do much better (so do their immune systems) when they are raised around animals. And your husband can be allergic to anything. The pollen count is crazy right now, its spring, everyone is allergic right now.

[Karen]

First of all, your husband should get his allergies tested, and not just assume it is the cat. Take it from me, there are many, many things that can cause an allergic reaction - I have many of them!

Second, cats are remarkable astute about babies. They will not lie on top of a newborn - it wiggles, smells funny, can erupt into a fire siren-like wail, and can vomit - nothing a cat wants to deal with.

[moosmom]

I think your doctor is a jerk. Animals are NOT the only cause of allergies and asthma. Plants, shrubs, trees, flowers, dust (in and out of your house) are also huge problems with people who have allergies. Get a second opinion. I feel very sorry for Star. She's been in your life since she was a baby and now you shove her outside??? She's better off with someone else who can truly care about her not just for her, who will keep her inside, away from predators.

I don't mean to sound heartless, as I've had to rehome a couple of my own cats. But not because I got married and had a baby.

If you DO choose to rehome her, please, PLEASE do a very thorough background check including vet names and phone #'s, at least 3 personal references, and a home visit, ask them how they feel about their furniture and what they would do if they saw Star start to scratch their precious belongings. If they mention declawing, reject them. Too many times (I've been in animal rescue for over 14 years) I've seen animals placed in homes that are totally in appropriate. Small children, boyfriends/husbands/significant others that would kick the cat when mad. I could go on but I think you get the idea. There are alot of weirdos out there.

Suggestion: Any friends who can take her and give her a decent home? If I lived close, I'd try and help you place her. Good luck and please keep us posted.

[StarandBratsmom]

I agree the doctor was a jerk.

[StarandBratsmom]

We want to get my husband tested, but we have no insurance and the tests around here are very expensive. It cost money we simply don't have. So the doctor suggested the cat was probably the reason, I hate people who don't understand about animals. It could just be something on her fur from being outside, or something my husband eats that he's allergic to. He has asmtha too, so that doesn't help with keeping Star inside, that was one of the reasons she became an outdoor inside kitty other than me being pregnant and unable to be around the litterbox.

I am glad to hear cats know not to get on babies. This is my first baby and I have no idea. No one in my family had cats when they had kids.

[Karen]

I think you can let Star back in, if you wipe her down with a damp cloth when she comes in, that should help get any pollen - which is everywhere this time of year - off her coat. If you can give her a good brushing outside, and then make it a habit of wiping her down - think of it as special petting time - when she comes in, it should cut down on both the pollen, and dander. Keep her out of your bedroom - if your husband IS allergic to her, she should be shedding where he sleeps, and make him wash his hands after he pets her, and to be sure not to touch his face before he washes his hands.

All these steps should help cut down on his reactions whether it is to her or the pollen she is bringing in. And then she, and you humans, can both be happier, and your husband hopefully healthier. Goodness, I cannot imagine being without health insurance as an asthmatic allergic person! The meds I am on now make it possible for me to go months without even needing my albuterol inhaler, except for right now, when there is so much pollen around Paul's blue car looks green!

[StarandBratsmom]

I think you can let Star back in, if you wipe her down with a damp cloth when she comes in, that should help get any pollen - which is everywhere this time of year - off her coat. If you can give her a good brushing outside, and then make it a habit of wiping her down - think of it as special petting time - when she comes in, it should cut down on both the pollen, and dander. Keep her out of your bedroom - if your husband IS allergic to her, she should be shedding where he sleeps, and make him wash his hands after he pets her, and to be sure not to touch his face before he washes his hands.

All these steps should help cut down on his reactions whether it is to her or the pollen she is bringing in. And then she, and you humans, can both be happier, and your husband hopefully healthier. Goodness, I cannot imagine being without health insurance as an asthmatic allergic person! The meds I am on now make it possible for me to go months without even needing my albuterol inhaler, except for right now, when there is so much pollen around Paul's blue car looks green!

Thank you Karen, that's a great idea. I am sure Star would love that too. My husband doesn't have asthma that often and rarely ever needs his inhalor. I need mine more than he does. Insurance is really high where he works. I have it but only because I am pregnant.