Carrie HELP! Dixie is having problems!

[Dixieland Dancer]

Carrie HELP!

Dixie is a Alpha female. Most dogs submit to her (except Aunt Jazz (RB)). Right before Jazz crossed over the bridge, Dixie challenged her for the first time in 4 years. We believe it was because Dixie knew Jazz was sick.

Anyway... Dusty isn't particuarly alpha. He is just a bubbly adolescent boy who doesn't think before he acts. When he sees something he wants he usually just goes and gets it. If Dixie has it, he will just go take it from her. When he was younger I think Dixie let him get away with these things. Now she growls and shows her teeth but he just looks at her like "what's your problem momma?" He just bounces around without a care in the world. I usually make him drop something he steals from her and then tell him to find his own. He looks at me for a moment, says Okay and bounces off to get his own. He really is just a big adolescent bouncy bubbly boy who doesn't have a care in the world!

Now that he is getting bigger (1 year old on May 2nd and weighing in at 75 pounds) Dixie is starting to display her alpha side to him more. Unfortantly he just ignores her. It's as if he doesn't even know she is sending signals.

I don't think he is challenging her for the alpha spot. I truly believe he just doesn't understand that she is alpha. I feed Dixie first and pet her first, etc etc.

My problem.... Because Dusty is not listening and following the signals that Dixie is giving, she is getting very moody and irritable. I was off of work the week before Easter and was home with the dogs for 12 days. Since I came back to work this week, every single day, Dixie has destroyed something in the house. Usually she only shreds papers to millionss of pieces. I don't know if you remember me ever saying she suffered from seperation anxiety. We worked on that and I thought we had it under control but I guess not. Perhaps she is regressing because I hadn't had a problem for almost a year. Anyway her harmless paper shredding became costly today. She shred the cushion on the love seat and it can't be repaired. I know it happened within 5 to 10 minutes of me leaving because my father in law (they live next door) came over to let the dogs out since he was doing yard work. He said I was only gone 5 or 10 minutes and when he went in to get them, the cushion was shredded. I mean all the foam was taken out and shredded to pieces.

My husband thinks she is doing it because she got use to me being home with her and is suffering from seperation anxiety again. I think it has something to do with Dusty not submitting to her the way she wants him too.

My confusion is whether it's Dusty's failure to comprehend she is alpha or another round of seperation anxiety or both! How would you handle this situation at this point?

Just another thought. They still play together all the time but lately Dixie has been getting a lot rougher and more serious. Again, Dusty doesn't seem to notice or care!

[anna_66]

I know I can't help, but Angus & Roxey are the same way, not the tearing up of anything, but Roxey tries to take Angus's toys, bones or whatever. He also used to let her do this, but now he gets really angry. I thought it was only because he was sick, but after hearing your story, maby we kinda have the same problem. He never wants to even try to play with Roxey, he just shows his teeth & growls. He still can't stand to be away from her, but also can't stand to be with her, unless she leaves him alone. I would like to hear what Carrie has to say.

[carrie]

The subtle way that dogs test out the water is often perplexing and difficult for us mere humans to sort out.

I know Dusty is an entire male and at his age he his hormone driven. As a typical male he is feeling on top of the world and king of the roost (due to the excellent care he is given, not only hormones). It is also Spring and that does have an affect.

From the way you describe the situation I do think that Dusty is showing some pretty mature Alpha behaviour. It seems to be Dixie that is finding it hard to maintain her position.

Dusty ignoring her bad temper and doing his own thing as though Mom isn't there is classic Alpha behaviour. This should be fascinating to watch as this is exactly what I try to get owners to do - it is only a very strong Alpha that is VERY secure in it's position that can do this with conviction. It would seem that Dixie is not ready to let go of the reins of power just yet.
Dusty is also immature enough NOT to want to stand up to Mom in a physical way if he can help it and, in fact, by avoiding the physical confrontation, he is winning the dominance war.

Dixie is showing her stress by her reliance on you as a back up and her distress when you leave.

What I think will happen is that the dominant role will go to Dusty. He is showing clear signs of dominance and Dixie is showing clear signs of being unable to cope with the challenge.

What I suggest you do is change the way you look at the pack order. You need to take on a more dominant role for both dogs first to ensure that Dusty's success with upsetting the pack order isn't taken too far and he doesn't feel he can challenge you. The next step will then be to treat Dusty as the more dominant and Dixie as the less dominant.

To start with you need to encourage Dixie to accept the natural order of things (younger animals will grow and take over from the older ones). By treating her as the more dominant you will be confusing her and giving conflicting messages to those she is getting from Dusty.
At feeding time, for instance, try the group feeding technique. Prepare the food (I strongly advise you then eat a grape or cracker or something off a plate next to the food bowls!!!). Get both dogs to sit, place the right bowl in front of the right dog and stand up nice and straight for a few seconds before giving the signal to eat.
At first place the bowls as far apart as possible and put yourself in the middle of them
- it is also useful to teach the technique to each dog individually before going for the group thing.
Both dogs must stay in a sit until you give the signal to eat - a whistle is great and can then be used for recall training too.

Both dogs have no choice but to see you as the ultimate alpha as you have total control over the food and have also eaten the best bits ( as far as the dogs can tell) first. They are now on an even footing as far as feeding goes.

Going in and out of doors and greeting should be controlled and swapped around for a while.
Get them both to sit at every door way that all three of you are going through or that you want both of them to go through. Eye contact is pretty important here (you should see it develop through the group feed too).
If you are not going through the door you want them to go through stick your head out when they are sitting - it is a sign to the dogs that you are checking that it is safe, thus taking this job away from them ( safety of pack is your responsibility not theirs) If you are going through the door you must tell them to stay and use a hand signal until you are through - then ask one at a time to come through. Next time the other dog is asked through first, the next time it changes again

The totally most important thing that I think you can do is to ignore the dogs greeting you when you enter the room they are in - it doesn't matter if you have been to the loo or been away for the weekend. As soon as they have gone away from you and settled - and stayed settled for ten minutes - then call them both over - get a sit and reward each dog with a quiet fuss and a very small treat if you like. Then tell them to go and lie down and when they have done that for ten minutes call them over - go to the door - go out in the garden and go nuts playing with them for half an hour!!!!

All of this will not only stamp your authority all over the pack as top dog but will also take the pressure of your support away from Dixie.

This should relax the tension that Dixie is feeling and if you see a big difference in her behaviour it would be worth greeting Dusty first and letting him through doors first more often.

I think you will see very definite results when you take the Alpha role to a more definite and deliberate state yourself and by treating the dogs in an more equal way you will take the responsibilty away from Dixie that she feels by you treating her as the more dominant dog, a role she seems to be struggling with.

Dixie's seperation anxiety will also be relieved by these steps - but you must be strong about it - the natural reaction is to cuddle up and be sympathetic to her.

If you could let me know what, if any, of my suggestions you try and what the reaction you get from both dogs is it would be really helpful.
You, of all people, know it is very difficult to advise without actually being there so as much feedback as possible please.

Good luck - it will work out in one of three ways - once you are neutral towards the dogs Dixie will take it upon herslf to assert her dominance, or at least try!!
Dusty will carry on ignoring her and she will accept it.
Or you will see them settle down and not be able to tell which is more dominant than the other.


Please keep me updated and ask as much as you like - it is a rare treat to get somone as dog savvy as you to try out my techniques and I am dying to know how you think it works out.

I am not pretending this is the cure - it is the first step and it will depend how things develop......Give it four days if you use the feeding trick ( you eating a little something before the dogs) and seven days if you don't.
If there is no change at all or things get worse within four days let me know.
Good luck - lots of love

[Dixieland Dancer]

Thanks for the Info Carrie! I guess in my heart I already knew what you are saying about Dusty showing some dominant traits. I just didn't want to really believe because Dixie is such a special girl to me and I don't want to see her challenged. I also don't want to see her distressed, so I will take the steps you recommend.

I knew you would know what was going on. I believe I may of been letting my emotions cloud the issue. Sometimes it is better to get outside opinions to remove the veil that covers our eyes.

I will let you know how it goes. I will only have one problem with the feeding and that is I am hand feeding Dusty his kibble since I am preparing him for his first obedience show. He has to do his obedience with me and then his food is the reward. Perhaps I will feed him half his kibble the way you suggested and use the rest for training. I don't want to over feed him. That is why I use the Kibble instead of treats.

The one thing that makes me laugh about the whole thing is, I need to be more dominant. I sometimes think I am way to aggressive and dominant. It is nice to know I'm not! LOL

Thanks again for the advice. I really do appreciate it.
{{{HUGS}}}

[carrie]

The first thing I said to myself when I read your post was, "C'mon Candy - you know EXACTLY what is happening - you just don't want to believe it!"
So forgive me for smiling at your response - it is hard when our emotional ties get into the mix. Believe me there has been more than one ocassion when I have been responsible for a group of dogs and have resisted the pack order because of my emotional ties. It is human nature and it is not easy to get over.

It's so funny that I knew that you knew what was happening and I also know exactly how you feel - you will get used to it and I assure you that the bond between you and Dixie is not less because her status has changed with Dusty.
I know that you know that I know that you are just brill - keep me posted!!