Dearest Flopsy, what a beautiful young French Lop Rabbit you are! That colorful coat is so pretty, and you have the sweetest face with those long pale ears and lovely big dark eyes. What a funny story of mistaken identity you have to tell! You were sold to your dear person as female and younger than you were. Imagine his/her surprise when the three females you lived with gave birth to six more kits! Since then you've been neutered, so there won't be more babies. Your people plan on keeping all ten of you, and your person loves having 10 bunnies. You are a very special bunny, and your people are glad you are theirs. You all love each other very much, don't you. What a wonderful love-filled home you share!
Congratulations, darling Flopsy, on being chosen Pet of the Day! We hope you and your dear person and all your family and friends are enjoying a fine celebration, full of fun and lovies and all your favorite games and treats.
I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.
-- Terry Pratchett (1948—2015), Sourcery
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