Jan - "I don't understand why the female human can't be more like the male human. He treats me like I'm the center of the universe. When he comes home to feed me, he starts talking in a funny voice - saying how pretty I am and how glad he is to see me. She just doesn't seem to do it right.

And then she has the nerve to get upset when I try to play with her - just because I want to show her how well I've been mantaining my lovely sharp claws - she's not impressed when I give her a demonstration on her hand. Silly human."