I am sorry, MOFF, that you are feeling the stress of this. Even a well reasoned 'no' is hard, isn't it?

I had a very similar situation present two weeks ago. Someone approached me with questions about neighbor's cat. It was obvious to me within two minutes this was nothing but a fishing expedition on could I or someone I know take their cat. It kind of peeved me. I am totally willing to help/answer anyone's legitimate questions about their cat. Don't pretend to seek answers to these questions just as a way to unload it on me. As if the 8 I have isn't enough.