John and I never exchanged gifts. At first, it was because he was out of work since our 2nd year together. Plus we get stuff all year that we find on sale or need for the house.

My niece is fostering 2 kids, with the intention to adopt. Her own 2 kids ( 10 and 8) are thriled). So we're buying for the 4 kids only. I have the impression that John's DIL doesn't appreciate anything unless it's from her mother. She Oohs and Aahs over our great gifts, but I never see them again, anywhere. So I may just give money and have her buy her own stuff for them, 'cause I give up.

I'm thrilled to spend a day with my awesome 96 y.o. uncle. I'm tempted to have John go his his DIL's (soon to be ex) with her family for dinner, while I spend the day with Carl, since it may be his last..who knows?