The countdown begins...

[Laura's Babies]

Of coarse he has changed! That is what he does best! He changes for every situation as needed. You mentioned he went to jail for domestic violence? WOW! I use to run the other way when a guy had a histroy of that, I wanted nothing to do with a man that had that in his past. As young as I was when I was first married, I learned I wanted NO part of a man like that and I ran like hell and never looked back. IF he has indeed changed, let someone else tell you about that years from now, you simply do not need anyone like that in your life if you want to be happy. It IS your furture and you are going to do what you want so I am just going to advise you to think with your head and not your heart!

[Catty1]

My best friend's dad beat his wife repeatedly when we were kids. He went to jail for a while, and has been living a happy life since then. He is a completely different person. You'd never guess he went to jail for domestic violence.

Laura, just to clarify - it's not him that Abby is talking about - it's a friend's father.

AG - I don't think it matters one whit what his family is like, or what they are doing, or what he is doing.

What I see you doing is rationalizing - I've done it a lot - your post is full of "yabbuts"..."yeah, but his mom..." "yeah, but my best friend's dad"..."yeah but I have seen changes in him"...etc.

This is a way of trying to justify what you are feeling, and what he is doing.

You don't love him - he doesn't love you. OBSESSION is OBSESSION - it is not love. (ignore the love songs on the iPod and radio, unless it's a rerun of Houston's "The Greatest Love Of All". THAT'S a song you need to take to heart.)

Tell his mom you need a time out for a while. And will you PLEASE see someone about counselling? Go back to those links I posted for you and REALLY read them.

You didn't date his mom, uncle, or anyone else. Drop it. And get professional help if you can't.