Dog Quotes

[cyber-sibes]

What a charming thread! Here's a few I've come across...

"In dog training, jerk is a noun, not a verb."
-- Dr. Dennis Fetko

"When its raining cats and dogs, be careful not to step in poodles."
--Unknown

"If your dog thinks you're the greatest person in the world, don't seek a second opinion."
--Jim Fiebig

"Blessed is the person who has earned the love of an old dog."
--Sydney Jeanne Seward

"Thorns may hurt you, men desert you, sunlight turn to fog;
but you're never friendless ever, if you have a dog."
--Douglas Mallock

"Scratch a dog and you'll find a permanent job."
-- Franklin P. Jones

[sumbirdy]

Did you ever notice when you blow in a dog's face he gets mad at you? But when you take him in a car he sticks his head out the window!
-- Steve Bluestone

My neighbor has two dogs. One of them says to the other, "Woof!" The other replies, "Moo!" The dog is perplexed. "Moo? Why did you say, "Moo'?" The other dog says, "I'm trying to learn a foreign language."
- Morey Amsterdam

Life is like a dogsled team. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes.
--Lewis Grizzard

There are three faithful friends--an old wife, an old dog and ready money.
--Ben Franklin.

The other day I saw two dogs walk over to a parking meter. One of them says to the other, "How do you like that? Pay toilets!"
--Dave Starr

I went to an exclusive kennel club. It was very exclusive. There was a sign out front: "No Dogs Allowed."
--Phil Foster

He that lieth down with dogs, shall rise up with fleas.
--Ben Franklin

I have a great dog. She's half Lab, half pit bull. A good combination. Sure, she might bite off my leg, but she'll bring it back to me.
--Jimi Celeste

When you leave them in the morning, they stick their nose in the door crack and stand there like a portrait until you turn the key eight hours later.
--Erma Bombeck

Every time I go near the stove, the dog howls ...
--Phillis Diller

I've been on so many blind dates I should get a free dog.
--Wendy Liebman

My advice to any diplomat who wants to have good press is to have two or three kids and a dog.
--Carl Rowan

I bought my grandmother a Seeing Eye dog. But he's a little sadistic. He does impressions of cars screeching to a halt.
--Larry Amoros

I like driving around with my two dogs, especially on the freeways. I make them wear little hats so I can use the car-pool lanes.
--Monica Piper

It was a small town: Ferguson, Ohio. When you entered there was a big sign and it said, "Welcome to Ferguson. Beware of the Dog." The all-night drugstore closed at noon.
--Jackie Vernon

A man bitten by a dog, whether the animal is mad or not, is apt to get mad himself.
--George D. Prentice 1802-1870 American Journalist & Humorist.

[sumbirdy]

The more I see of the depressing stature of people, the more I admire my dogs.
--Alphonse de Lamartine 1790-1869 French Poet.

Revenge is often like biting a dog because the dog bit you.
--Austin O’Malley 1858-1932 American Oculist.

Man is an animal that makes bargains; no other animal does this--no dog exchanges bones with another.
--Adam Smith 1723-1790 Scottish Politician and Economist

Heaven goes by favor; if it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
--Mark Twain

The great pleasure of a dog is that you make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, he will make a fool of himself too.
--Samuel Butler

My little dog -- a heartbeat at my feet.
--Edith Wharton.

She had no particular breed in mind, no unusual requirements. Except the special sense of mutual recognition that tells dog and human they have both come to the right place.
--Lloyd Alexander, American writer.

The poor dog, in life the firmest friend, "The first to welcome, foremost to defend."
--Lord Byron, an epitaph for his dog Boatswain.

A good dog never dies he always stays he walks besides you on crisp autumn days when frost is on the fields and winter's drawing near, his head is within our hand in his old way.
--Mary Carolyn Davies

They never talk about themselves but listen to you while you talk about yourself, and keep up an appearance of being interested in the conversation.
--Jerome K. Jerome, English humorist

Not Carnegie, Vanderbilt and Astor together could have raised money enough to buy a quarter share in my little dog.
--Ernest Thompson Seton, American writer and naturalist.

Acquiring a dog may be the only opportunity a human ever has to choose a relative.
--Mordecai Siegal, Contemporary Writer

Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring -- it was peace.
--Milan Kundera

His name is not wild dog anymore, but the first friend, because he will be our friend for always and always and always.
--Rudyard Kipling

Faithful:
With eye upraised his master’s look to scan,
The joy, the solace, and
the aid of man:
The rich man’s guardian and the poor man’s friend,
The only creature faithful to the end.
--George Crabbe.