Scott, I'm so very sorry, reading your post brought tears to my eyes. You did what you thought was the best treatment for Scooty, and now things have turned out completely different, and no one can tell you why. That is hard to understand, and not easy to accept.

I know your pain and your sadness, I've been through the same when I lost my beloved soulmate Katz, also after 14 years. You said that you would like to honor her life somehow, and I really think that it may be a good way to cope with the loss. During the long grieving process following the months of Katz's passing, I started building a pet loss website in her name, and later, I dedicated a tribute page to my beloved girl. But everyone has to find out what works best for him in such a situation. Talking to others, who have experienced the same, helps a lot.

But it takes time, and the first weeks are the worst. It's like we're never going to smile again. But with the passing of time, you will find that you will remember all the great moments you shared, with a smile on your face, and with all the love for her in your heart...

Kirsten