Jenny Wilbanks was a sweet enough girl,
She thought she'd give a marriage a whirl.
She hooked up with this local Mason guy...
But, in photos she had these real wild eyes.

Cupid shot a some arrows with his bow.
This love was infectious, it demanded a show.
A giant church to hold a nuptials
Aw sh!t, there may be trouble,
(My problem is I can't rhyme "nuptial" )

The day was set, preparations were set.
Dresses made, obligations met!
A dream come true for this southern belle-
The idea was heaven, the results were hell!

Six hundred guests for this small marriage stint.
It must've cost the parents quite a mint.
The people flew and drove from near and far.
By airplane and truck and by rental car!

The stress was growing, the tension thick.
The bride was growing mentally sick.
Seconds thoughts were in her brain.
I have to leave town! Maybe by train??

No, she thought! I'll take a bus!
I'll quietly escape all the fuss.
I'll go Greyhound, I bought my fare!
A change of clothes and cut my hair!

I'll trim my 'do and leave the strands.
For searchers to find, on Georgia land.
I'll slip out of town, without a sound.
I'll elude all efforts to be found.

I'll head out west...To the mountains or sea?
I'll go to Vegas, that's the place that I'll be.
What happens there, just stays in Vegas.
While the search for me, in Georgia, still rages.

And then, late on that fateful night,
she disappeared from everyone's sight!
she disappeared from her evening jog.
And leave them checking under rocks and logs.

Now the family finds that Jenny is lost.
CALL THE COPS!! DAMN THE COST....
Dogs and searchers, copters and trucks.
No sign of Jenny....Are we outta luck?

The police conference, the media storms town!
"We have reason to believe, that Jenny's not around!"
Kidnapped or killed? By who or by what?
Let's blame the husband, case open? case shut!

Six hundred guests, left out in limbo
By the actions of one neurotic bimbo!
While she was out, seeing the world.
Slowly the minds of her family twirled.

If Jenny was taken, how will she be found?
Geraldo thinks, Greta makes sounds...
This may be like something done by a guy named Scott...
He 'dumped' his wife....Now, there is a thought!

Now Mason denies that detector test.
'I didn't kill Jenny, give it a rest!'
The pastor speaks to the media at large.
The police man now speaks, I think he's a Sarge!

On the eve of the wedding, a service is set
To pray for poor Jenny, who hasn't turned up yet!
And lo and behold, in the middle of the night
Jenny is alive! Her home a happy site!

Mason is beaming, She's alive and called home!
Is she being ransomed or is she alone?
Don't be silly, in danger, she's not!
She's calling from a 7-11 parking lot!

The emergency dispatcher on a 911 line.
Has determined Ms. Jenny is safe and is fine!
The woman from Georgia was kidnapped from town,
By a van and a woman and some Hispanic clown.

They drove her west, they cut her hair.
The dastardly deeds, done by this pair!!!
The cops take her down, to the local police station.
And the news is welcomed by the awakening nation!

Jenny is alive, and none the worse for wear.
Just some scary days and the loss of her hair.
But with some expert police grilling.
Jenny's guts a start to a spilling.

Well, maybe the story isn't THAT real.
It all started when I started to feel-
pressured by marriage, and all the arrangements.
Led to my nerves and to my derangement.

I disappeared into that thin air-
This marriage thing, it gave me a scare!
I lost my spine,I did get cold feet!
With that, I just had to hit the street.

The problems I caused all seem so small-
I just had to leave, get away from y'all!
Don't hate me for leaving you all in a lurch.
I was afraid of what would happen inside that church.

Let me go home, Just not by bus!
First class airfare and some airport fuss!
A blanky on my head, my face I'll a-hide-a
The way the women are treated by Al-Queda!

Clutching a stuffed bear, reserved for lost kiddies
The nation begins by granting her pity,
Poor woman got nerves and then had to run.
Leaving a city in Georgia, not having fun.

Poor people that were searching for a local town daughter,
she was in a place where the weather was hotter!
Some people were mad, some people had pity...
Were charges to be filed, by a lawyer, for the city?


The boyfriend and pastor have spoken and said.
It's not over, they soon will be wed!
The first thing that happens is to find out the fines
she'll have to pay for her stupid, little crime.

She's safe back at home, this georgia peach.
Safe from reporters and the camera's reach.
But there are still many questions about this sick stunt.
and the answers are held by this stupid little 'girl'.