Lisa - the behaviorist is on a forum. It is at ivillage.com and the forum is an informational one called "Think Like A Cat". The behaviorist is Pam Johnson-Bennett. It took several days for her to respond - but she wrote me a long answer all about Lizzie and it was full of suggestions. Some were making sure *I* do the feeding and no free feeding so she associates me with food. I now approach and pet her while she eats....one on one play time with her.....plenty of scratching posts in different places in the house....multiple perches/cat trees at different locations....Feliway (I did not buy it $42 a diffuser at PetsMart!!)....clicker followed by a treat to use with good behaviors....at least one catbox away from the rest of them.....distraction when she gets aggressive....refusing to play if she bites or uses claws...isolation and reintroduction as needed. I have been doing all of these things except the Feliway. I also am not good about the clicker because it is not always near where I am and I forget to keep it in my pocket - but I have been using it Also - Dennis had a good idea and I am doing this too - get down on all fours at her level and meow and talk to her!! Weird but she LOVES this!! She actually comes up and touches my nose with hers when I do this.

The behaviorist seemed to think that the others (especially surrogate mama Emily) hissing at her when she returned from her spay was particularly upsetting. She called the staring at me that Lizzie does "staus-related aggression" but really did not explain.