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Thread: Just reading a book of a cat counsellor, and now I feel bad!

  1. #1
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    Just reading a book of a cat counsellor, and now I feel bad!

    I'm currently reading a book ("Cat Confidential: The Book Your Cat Would Want You to Read", but a German copy) written by the British cat counsellor, Vicky Halls, and I have to admit it makes me feel a bit guilty, and bad.

    The author is very much against keeping cats indoor. According to her, most behavioral problems are a result of indoor keeping, and after reading her book, it seems to me that it's impossible for an indoor cat to be happy.

    Another thing that confuses me it that she's also very sceptical when it comes to multicat households. In her opinion, living with other kitties means a lot of stress for a cat, as it's an unnatural arrangement. She states that if cats get along fine with each other, it's just their great adaptability to unnatural environments.

    Also, she seems to doubt that cats love us. She said at some point that this is just wishful thinking...

    Anyway, I look at my Luna and I see very well how stressed she is when Lily is stalking her, and I know that her bladder problems could very well be stress related. I know that she has also stopped playing when Lily moved in. But there are also times when they are snuggling, or washing each other! So does Luna really hate having Lily around?! And speaking of Lily, maybe she's only stalking Luna because the life of an indoor cat is too boring and unstimulating for such a smart kitty? Reading this book really makes me feel like a bad, irresponsible cat mommy who did everything wrong!

    However, I just read some of the reviews on Mrs. Halls' books on amazon.com, and obviously I'm not the only one who feels that way. Is there anyone here who has read one of her books, too?

    Kirsten

  2. #2
    Join Date
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    Remember, Kirsten - this writer has an opinion. Opinions are like noses (or a**holes, lol) - each person has one and they are all different.

    Both my boys are indoors and very spoiled and happy. Oscar had been a feral boy...he adjusted well, but after Cole moved in a year later, he developed a cystitis that the vet said was caused by stress. Any change, even a GOOD change, can cause stress.

    He wanted to put Oscar on meds...but thanks to PT I had heard of Feliway, and asked if I could use that. He said yes. I got Oscar a very stretchy collar that would come off easily if caught on something, and would squirt a little Feliway into the collar each morning. (after shaking the bottle).

    The patent is off Feliway now, and it is half the price it used to be.

    HUGS and don't worry about this. Everyone here knows how much your babies are loved and how you go to any lengths for them!
    "Do or do not. There is no try." -- Yoda

  3. #3
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    My boys are indoor kitties and very happy to be so! You can leave the door wide open and they just look at it and don't step a foot outside. Ming is scared of the outdoors and Mac was abandoned on the streets for awhile by his former so-called owners, so he KNOWS how good inside is. If I could make them a special enclosure to play in outdoors I would, but I live in an apartment and that is not possible. They are very happy and healthy and that is what counts.
    Proud to be a crazy cat lady!

  4. #4
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    Very True Candace.. I will bet this lady dont even have a cat & let alone not a indoor cat.. I want you to know my babies are very happy.. I would not let the book bother you.. Just lay the book down & forget about it..
    Quote Originally Posted by Catty1 View Post
    Remember, Kirsten - this writer has an opinion. Opinions are like noses (or a**holes, lol) - each person has one and they are all different.

    ~~~Thank You Very Much {Kim} kimlovescats for the Grand Siggy~~~

    [[ Furr Babies are Like Potato Chips **** No One Can Have Just One ]]
    ****** Kindness, Mercy & Justice to All Living Creatures ******
    {{{{{Everyday is a Gift = That's why it's Called the Present }}}}}
    ((( Each Day With Our Pets is a Surprise Package Waiting to be Opened )))
    <Sunsets are God's Reminder to Us That At The End of the Day We're All In This Together>

  5. #5
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    If this is true then MOST of us PTers are bad cat purrents. I don't believe it. It might be true with some kitties. But then every cat is different and unique. That's why we love them.
    I can tell you this. When Paizly got out and was stuck outside overnight she didn't seem happier. In fact I don't think she left the deck area which is right outside the door. Once back inside she was a happy camper. And she lived her first few weeks on the street (at least I think).

    I wouldn't believe a word of this, to be honest. I would never have an outside cat again. It's WAY too dangerous out there with cars and other animals and PEOPLE!
    Our goal in life should be - to be as good a person as our dog thinks we are.

    Thank you for the siggy, Michelle!


    Cindy (Human) - Taz (RB Tabby) - Zoee (RB Australian Shepherd) - Paizly (Dilute Tortie) - Taggart (Aussie Mix) - Jax (Brown & White Tabby), - Zeplyn (Cattle Dog Mix)

  6. #6
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    First of all Kirsten I certainly would dispute whether Cats should be outdoors.
    Ebony Beau Tubster , Golden Rod , Ebonite , Orange Blossom and the Scratchys would all be alive had they been Indoor Cats , as well as the Many Cats we see who have been hit by Cars.
    Indoor Cats are a lot safer and as a Multi Cat Giardian I would day that there can be personality clashes , but that they generally work themselves out .
    And My Indoor Cats are happy , I try to leave toys about so thier minds stay active!
    And the fcat that some of My Found Cats have had 15 hapy yeras with me disproves this authors point.
    You are a very Good Guardian Kirsten , sometimes writers say something cotreversial as a selling point for thier books , whether they believe them or not.
    THE RAINBOW BRIDGE FOUND HOTEL ANGELS HAVE A NEW FRIEND IN CORINNA.


    ALMOND ROCCA BATON AND ELLIE ANGELS ARE GUARDIANS TO ETERNAL KITTENS ROCC-EL AND T TEEN ANGEL, ALMOND ROCA , VLAD , PAWLEE , SPRITE. LITTLE HEX, OSIRIS AND ANNIE ANGELS.
    EBONY BEAU TUBSTER AND PEACHES BW SPIKE & SMOKEY


    NOW PRECIOUS AND SAM ARE TOGETHER WITH ETERNAL KITTENS SAMMY ,PRESLEY, SYLVESTER AND SCRATCHY JR , MIGHTY MARINA, COSMIC CARMEN, SAMSON ,UNDER KITTY AND SUNKIST AUTUMN & PUMPKIN.
    MIA AND ORANGE BLOSSOM ANGELS HAVE ADOPTED TUXIE , TROOPER , SONGBIRD AND LITTLE BITTY KITTIES MIA-MI BLOSSOMER, TUXEDO AND DASH AS THIER ETERNAL KITTENS.
    PRINCESS JOSEPH AND MICHAEL ARE CELEBRATING 19 YEARS AS LUCKY FOUND CATS

  7. #7
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    My boys have no interest in the great outdoors, either, and I'm glad they don't! I don't have to worry about them being cold, hot, rained on, stalked by other animals and/or humans, being run over by a car, getting infested with fleas and ticks, and getting lost.

    They love being spoiled, being able to nap on the beds, getting good meals and clean fresh water. I should have such a soft life!
    Loving meowmie to Archy & Binky (RIP my sweet boy 10/13/10)

    =^..^=

    I

  8. #8
    Nah, I'm not buying it. Perfect world: cats could be indoor/outdoor w/no problems but it's a dangerous world out there, especially for cats. If she thinks that they're stressed being around other cats, then perhaps she could explain why Pidge cries when she can't find her man Boo or why Specs cries when he can't find Boo. Several years ago I rescued a male and his two sisters, had them altered and found a home for one of the females. While the other female was in hospital recuperating, the male, Chessie, wouldn't eat or even drink water. When I brought his sister home and reunited them, he ran over to her and actually put his "arm" around her and meowed like crazy as though he were saying "Where were you? I missed you so much!" Then he went straight to the food and water dishes and chowed down. Appetite suddenly mysteriously returned!

    As for cats not loving us, she should see my deaf little CH baby Creamsicle when I come home. She could be in a room full of people and, believe me, she loves attention, but she'll run straight to me and cry until I pick her up.

    As Candace said, it's just this woman's opinion. You're doing wonderfully by your cats; we all are here on PT (except when a certain one of us, me, makes a stupid mistake but we all make 'em, as someone told me). So put your worry hat away, Kirsten. Lily and Luna love you and each other and their happy home and they wouldn't have it any other way.
    Blessings,
    Mary



    "Time and unforeseen occurrence befall us all." Ecclesiastes 9:11

  9. #9
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    Thanks for your replies and opinions! You're probably right... Maybe this woman's opinion comes from the fact that in her job, she's usually seeing kitties with issues, and not those who live a happy life.

    What really confused me is that she often seems to advice to seperate kitties and find another home for them when they don't get along. A couple of weeks ago, I read a book by another cat therapist, and she said that this was the last thing she would try, and that in most cases, this can be avoided. So there seem to be different opinions on this matter, even among kitty therapists.

    Kirsten

  10. #10
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    Well, I don't think ALL cats can get along and live happy lives. I mean, look at Moesha and the Schroeder incident. And me with my friends cat I'm watching. When you are in fear of a cat getting hurt by another then you can't have those cats together. My temporary cat is going home this month so Paizly will have peace for a while until I decide if I can get another cat. Now I'm just so afraid she won't accept a cat at all. But my plan is to either get a kitten (which I don't really want to do) or find one that is known to be fine with other cats.
    Even though after the encounters Paizly has had with G she bounces back and doesn't seem traumatized at all, it stresses ME out too much. The last one I seriously thought he could have injured her had I not been there to break it up. So, unfortunately, G doesn't come out of his room very often.
    Our goal in life should be - to be as good a person as our dog thinks we are.

    Thank you for the siggy, Michelle!


    Cindy (Human) - Taz (RB Tabby) - Zoee (RB Australian Shepherd) - Paizly (Dilute Tortie) - Taggart (Aussie Mix) - Jax (Brown & White Tabby), - Zeplyn (Cattle Dog Mix)

  11. #11
    Yes, not all cats get along. My RB Peeka hated Pidge, hated her! She attacked her every chance she got, stalked her, waited for her to come out of the litter box, etc. Pidge spent a lot of time under my bed until Peeka finally let up but still, every once in a while, she'd strike. Cats are individuals just as people are. Not all people get along so why should we think that all cats will? And what is a cat therapist anyhow?
    Blessings,
    Mary



    "Time and unforeseen occurrence befall us all." Ecclesiastes 9:11

  12. #12
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    I remember reading a British article years ago about indoor only cats attempt to commit suicide whenever possible... this came right after Pouncer took his famous plunge off the balcony and broke his foot. Do I think he was trying to commit suicide? Heck no! He was chasing a bird that flew away and he didn't have the advantage of wings.

    I can say with perfect confidence that your girls are happy and return the love you give them.

  13. #13
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    Kirsten, You are a Meowmie with absolutely nothing to feel bad about. I've never had the honor and privelige of meeting Luna and Lily in person but I have had the pleasure of seeing their pictures and reading about them in your posts. The unconditional love and care you give them has always come shining through! And it's clear to see how much they love you in return!!!

    Just who does this person think she is? Where does she get off saying such unfounded things? Of course our kitties love us! Groucho is always waiting for me at the door when I get in from work and the excited greeting I get from him is the best part of my day. Over the last months before my Mom passed away, he was my greatest comfort. Their snuggles, their kisses, the devoted look in their eyes when they see us, if that's not love what is?

    There's nothing wrong with keeping them as indoor only. Our indoor kitties are safe and all of their needs are met as they want them. I remember our vet saying indoor kitties don't miss going outside once they get used to staying in. On this, I'll go with our vet.

    I can't and won't accept this theory that multi-cat homes cause stress and problems. Even human siblings get on each other's nerves from time to time. Granted, there are situations where two or more kitties in the same home doesn't work out. But like us, each kitty has their own unique personality and at times they clash.

    You're one of the best Meowmies I know. Please don't take this nonsense to heart.
    FIND A PURPOSE IN LIFE.....BE A BAD EXAMPLE

  14. #14
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    I think that author is full of pee biscuits and tootsie rools! She clearly has never known the love of a cat! There is no other way to describe what we have all experienced with our furkids. The way Calvin looks at me there is NO doubt it's love.
    In regards to indoor/outdoor living, my boys were born city cats so they've never known different. They are perfectly happy as is. No one can or should generalize about kitties or people. Everyone is different. Every feline unique. How do you explain Christian the lion? Or the fact that my childhood cat Gigi, found me forty miles from where she was sent to live when my family moved from NY to CA, only having seen my friends house (where I spent the summer) from the car window once when I was dropped off?
    Put down the book and go kiss a kitty!

  15. #15
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    To me this women does not give cats their due. She is lumping cats in with the animals that work by instinct alone and does not consider that cats are individuals and can make choices.

    And yes my cats love me and wnat my attention. Ask LJ if she wants to go outside. "No, it was a good day I landed on your porch."
    Anne
    Meowmie to Lucy Lou and Barney, and Aunt to Timmy (RIP)

    Former kitties now in foster care: Nellie aka Eleanor van Fluffytail (at a Cat Cafe), Lady Jane Grey, Bob the Bobtail, and Callie. Kimi has been adopted into another family that understands Siamese. HRH Oliver Woodrow von Katz is in a Sanctuary.

    I'm Homeless, but with resources, and learning to live again.


    RIP Timmy (nephew kitty) May 17, 2018, Mr. Spunky (May 10, 2017), Samwise (Dec 2, 2014), Emily (Oct 8, 2013), Rose (Sept 24, 2001), Maggie (Fall 2003)

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