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Thread: The Cat in the Hat gets neutered

  1. #1

    The Cat in the Hat gets neutered

    From Jan:



    The Cat in the Hat Gets Neutered
    By Annie Bridge, CVT

    It was not me - not me at all.
    It was not me who made the call
    The call to take me to the vet.
    But it was you, yes you, I bet.

    You took me in the family car
    Just you and I, we went quite far.
    You put me in my little box
    And tightened down the little locks.
    You gave me to the Dr.'s Tech
    Who gently stroked me on my neck,
    And called me "Handsome Kitty Boy,"
    In voice so sweet and full of joy!!
    Oh, yes! Oh, Yes! I love this place!
    A smile appeared upon my face.
    But then the nurse, she took my hat.
    "Oh, no!" said I. "I can't have that!"
    You give it back! Don't play this game
    Cat IN the hat - that is my name!
    She gave it back - a little wink -
    "Something's up" I start to think.
    But could I leave? Oh, no, not me.
    They caged me up, my hat and me.
    The nurse gave me a needle poke,
    I knew right then, this is no joke.
    My head! The room! They start to spin,
    Oh my . . . Don't know . . . where I begin . . .

    A tiny mask upon my nose,
    A funny feeling in my toes,
    Then someone took each of my paws
    And clipped the tips off all my claws
    And greased my eyes with phony tears
    And stuck a cone in both my ears
    Thennnnn . . .

    The Dr. took my nu-nus small
    And splashed them both with alcohol
    And made a tiny little cut
    And pulled them firmly from my butt.
    Now . . . mind you . . . this is all a blur
    It happened ('cause I'm missing fur)
    I every now and then recall
    The slightest smell of alcohol.

    But still, I do go out at night,
    And never yowl or scratch and fight,
    Or sit upon the fencing rail,
    And arch my back and bush my tail.

    My human's happy most of all,
    I've not since peed upon her wall
    Or sprayed her bed or chair or door,
    Nope, I don't do that anymore.

    I now just "sun" upon my porch . . .
    I really don't know why
    I never chase the pretty girls
    As they go strutting by.
    I never run into the street,
    Can you imagine that?
    They may have got the family jewels
    They'll never get the hat!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Location
    Iowa
    Posts
    9,253
    Very cute and funny!
    Nancy



    All things work together for good to them that love God.
    (Romans 8:28)

    I've been defrosted-- Thanks, Sana

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
    Posts
    12,662
    HILARIOUS! (Although my Trevor and Andy might not agree! )

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2003
    Location
    North East Ohio
    Posts
    11,760
    That was great!
    ~Angie, Sierra & Buddy
    **Don't breed or buy while shelter dogs die!**

    I suffer from multiple Shepherd syndrome



  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Posts
    40,170
    That Was So Funny.
    I Know That Tubster Panther Doesnt Agree As He Was With Pouncer Roccalno, He Went Behind Her And Boy Was She Mad!!
    Smacked Him Across The Chops.
    But Tubster Panther Still Wants Out ,, Even Though All He Has Are Memories Of The Way He Was!!!!!!!!!!!!
    THE RAINBOW BRIDGE FOUND HOTEL ANGELS HAVE A NEW FRIEND IN CORINNA.


    ALMOND ROCCA BATON AND ELLIE ANGELS ARE GUARDIANS TO ETERNAL KITTENS ROCC-EL AND T TEEN ANGEL, ALMOND ROCA , VLAD , PAWLEE , SPRITE. LITTLE HEX, OSIRIS AND ANNIE ANGELS.
    EBONY BEAU TUBSTER AND PEACHES BW SPIKE & SMOKEY


    NOW PRECIOUS AND SAM ARE TOGETHER WITH ETERNAL KITTENS SAMMY ,PRESLEY, SYLVESTER AND SCRATCHY JR , MIGHTY MARINA, COSMIC CARMEN, SAMSON ,UNDER KITTY AND SUNKIST AUTUMN & PUMPKIN.
    MIA AND ORANGE BLOSSOM ANGELS HAVE ADOPTED TUXIE , TROOPER , SONGBIRD AND LITTLE BITTY KITTIES MIA-MI BLOSSOMER, TUXEDO AND DASH AS THIER ETERNAL KITTENS.
    PRINCESS JOSEPH AND MICHAEL ARE CELEBRATING 19 YEARS AS LUCKY FOUND CATS

  6. #6

    Re

    That is very cute!

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    I know the way to San Jose!
    Posts
    1,586
    I think Don Juan still remembers how he was, even though the Humane Society rendered him incapable of BEING a Don Juan before I took him home. He sometimes tries to mount Zerlina! (She responds with a yowl that I think translates as "HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU I'VE BEEN SPAYED!!!")

    Liz
    [b]"Virtue is triumphant only in theatrical productions." --The Mikado



  8. #8
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Location
    Santa Clara, CA
    Posts
    27,647
    LOL Very cute.
    Owned by Sky, Pearl, Ziggy Stardust, Alani, Blaze, Colby, Finnegan, and Summer.


    My Rainbow Bridge Babies:
    RB Pepper 3/17/97- 2/3/03 RIP Sweet Pepper
    RB Starr 3/22/05- 7/1/09 RIP Sweet Starr
    RB Sunny 8/25/00- 2/28/10 RIP Sweet Sunny
    RB Storm 1/11/96- 8/2/12 RIP Sweet Storm

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