[Dear You. . .]

**ILoveMyAbbyGirl** · 02-11-2008, 12:00 AM

[This is a thread based off of the LiveJournal community called dearyou. This is where you write a letter to someone (you don't have to mention who, it can be to anyone you know, online or not) and spill your feelings. Maybe it's something you can't say to them in person... but write it out here, and get it off your chest. Post as often as you want.]

Dear Dad,

You continue to unknowingly break my heart every day. I'm happy that you are happy with your fiancee, but I can't stand her. She has changed you in so many ways... I can't begin to count. I want my dad back, I want my best friend back. I want YOU back.

I feel as though I'm being kicked out of my own house. I've started staying with mom sometimes, and recently, you asked me to move out of my room and into the makeshift room you guys made for Katlynn, your soon-to-be stepdaughter. The makeshift room consists of two standing room dividers and three walls... a decent sized "room".

But kicking me out so Katlynn can have privacy? What about me? What about YOUR DAUGHTER? I'm sorry, she isn't your daughter. You said, "She needs privacy. Besides, all you do is sleep here."

I started to cry, but you had already walked away. I'm not even allowed a bedroom anymore because "I'm only here to sleep".

You aren't the daddy you used to be.

I miss you.

Love,
Your beyond heartbroken daughter.

**pitc9** · 02-11-2008, 10:35 AM

Did you write this letter or are you just telling us about the website?

**Catty1** · 02-11-2008, 11:16 AM

I think she wrote the letter...and the site is a 'safe' place to write it.

ILMAG - this comes from your broken heart.

I know you and your dad were closer once. Have you considered giving him a copy of this letter?

With maybe one change, like here: "You continue to unknowingly break my heart every day. I'm happy that you are happy with your fiancee, but it seems like you have changed in so many ways since you have been with her... I can't begin to count. I want my dad back, I want my best friend back. I want YOU back."

This way, you are saying how your dad has changed, and not blaming someone else for it - so it puts the response on him to answer you (and keeps hard feelings from getting in the way

)

He may not really know exactly how you feel, and this tells the story, clearly. Think about it, k?

{{{hugs}}}

**CountryWolf07** · 02-11-2008, 11:21 AM

You should give that letter to your dad. That should honestly give him a insight of what he's forgotten to be, to you..

I will write a letter, to my grandmother I lost in 1999.

Here I go:

Dear Nana:

It's been 9 years since the day I lost you. I miss you every day, and it seems like just yesterday that I was giving you a hug goodbye, not knowing it was my last time to see you. You are my guardian angel, I know you are by my side at all times, no matter where I am.

So much have happened in my life since you left to be in a better place. I turned 16, I got my driver's license at 17, I graduated from high school. I attended college, and now I am about to graduate either next Winter or Spring quarter. I sure wish you could be here to see me get my diploma at Ohio State.

I sometime would like to think you sent Mike to me. He is such a wonderful guy. You should see him with me. He is so good to me, I realize how lucky I am every time I am able to be with him. I visited you at Holy Cross on the 4th of July, and Mike was with me. I could have never done it without him. I couldn't face to say hi and have a talk with you for 9 years until he said he would take me. You'd love him. He's a Irish.

He even got me to eat corn beef and a little bit of cabbage on St. Patrick's Day. Remember how you used to try to get me to eat that when I was little?

He has succeeded, haha. Mom and Dad likes him a lot, Rory and Tyler thinks he's the one for me. I think he is the one for me, it is in my gut that is telling me so. He will be meeting most of everyone at the family reunion next Sunday. I am excited to have him meet everyone, like Aunt Eileen, Aunt Collen, Uncle Bob and Aunt Sissy, and Papa, too. Papa likes him, too. He has met him a couple times.

So, I hope you are happy wherever you are now. I know you are, 100% pain free and back to health. I think of you daily, and I know you are watching over me.

I miss and love you so much, I cannot wait until the day I see you again.

Love you,

Rachel

**animal_rescue** · 02-11-2008, 02:09 PM

Matt,
You really hurt me and I can't even tell you how much. I feel lame for writing you but when I try to talk to you it doesn't come out right. You literally broke up with me for no reason and I'll never understand why. I feel so stupid and rejected right now. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, just make myself feel better. You were so sweet to me and seemed to care a lot. Talking about our relationship, you made me feel like we were going to be together for a long time. You talked about this summer and even your birthday. I honestly didn't want to be with anyone else but you. I still don't actually, and that hurts even more. I was so ready to love you and just be with you. I wanted to give you all of me emotionally (and I guess that was one of the reason you dumped me.) I was ready to be serious and you weren't, you seemed like it for awhile, so why and how can you just changed will bother me so much. You're one of my best friends maybe not like Heather, Rachel, or Kristen but you're still so important to me. I don't even feel like you care about the break up, honestly I think it's affecting me more than you. I asked you if you thought you were falling in love with me and you said yes. This isn't what you do when you care about something like that. Something is wrong with this all. I honestly believe you're hiding something from me. Whether it's another girl, sexual problem, or some other problem. I just want you to be honest with me and let me know what's really going on. I also want you to know that you could have just talked to me and we would have figured it out togehter. I understand your not having feelings for me, what I can't understand is why they went away. I trusted you to never hurt me and I know your there for me to make me feel better, but right now I'm at my worst and there's nothing you can do because you're the reason why I'm so upset right now. Maybe if I hated you or if I was mad at you for it, it would make this all easier. But the thing is I don't. I don't know why but I don't. I guess a part of me hates you but in the end it's just pain. My friends have been trying to help me by keeping me busy and talking to me, all I really want is to talk to you though. That's honestly when I feel better. I meant it when I said that you were the good in my life and thought you felt the same or something similiar. Maybe we did rush into things and maybe we shouldn't have done some of the stuff, but I don't regret any of it. I felt safe with you and comfortable. I did stuff I had never done with anyone before and I felt ok about it all. I still believe that I would be with you again eventually. But I'm scared now, if we do end up together again I can't handle being hurt like this again. I'm also scared that we won't be back together again. It took us so long to get together, we talked and really got to know each other. You told me that I was the one you really wnated to talk to when you got online and I felt the same. I'm not trying to get you to take me back but when you can I just want a better explanation. Because it's bull that you can just up and leave because "you don't know" I feel like this is an ending, not of us but of my grieving. Not completely either but of me being completely miserable. I promised I would never let myself cry over a guy and I had my guard up with you for a really long time, when I let it down I was so scared but then you made me trust you and I did. I guess I will never really understand all of this and I don't think I'll ever really be over this. You were my first serious boyfriend and you'll always have a part of me I can't take back. even if we did stop talking, I'd always remember you. I don't want to lose you, Matt, and even though it's really going to hurt to see you just as a friend, I'd so much rather see you as just a friend then never see you again. I don't know how much trust I have in you anymore and I want to trust that you will still be my friend, there is just so much doubt in that. I guess when I see you in person will really be the test. I guess it was pretty pointless to write you and I don't think I see anything coming out of this but I just felt like I had to do it. I've cried so much that tears aren't even coming out anymore, I never thought that was possible. Once again I just don't understand and thats what hurts the most. I still want you and I feel like you aren't even giving me a chance. I know we can't have a relationship when just one person wants it, but we did both really want it for awhile. And I'm sorry if this made you feel bad, I didn't want it to. I just want you to understand how I feel. Please still be my friend and actually come see me in person. I promise not to talk about this anymore. I really shouldn't be feeling bad about this, but I do and I don't know when I'm going to feel better. But I gues I'll just end this now and start moving on. I know i'm strong and I get through this, it just doesn't make it any easier. Take Care.

Your Friend, Megan

**Sparklecoon** · 02-11-2008, 02:22 PM

Josh,

I love you with all my heart. When I left I thought their were prettier pastures. I only found emptiness. No one was you. No matter how hard I tried. One year I was gone, six months of it without a single word from you. When I saw you again it was almost too much to bear.

Now that we're together again I can't picture myself with anyone else. I want to be your one and only til the day I die. I wish you could believe me when I tell you such. I wish you were more secure with the love we have. I know I've hurt you before. I've lied and turned your life upside down. I just hope someday you'll come to believe that I'll never let you down again. You are my best friend. You are my soulmate. You mend all the broken pieces inside me. You are more important to me than friends and my family. With you by my side I feel that anything is possible. I live you more and more as the days go by. I know I don't show it as much as you wish I would but take pleasure in knowing that your the only one in my heart.

Forever Yours,
Erica

**Catty1** · 02-11-2008, 02:25 PM

not to hijack...just if anyone wants to check this out...it's been quiet there, but lots of folks who were hurting from breakups came through it. Lurk and read the first post for some notes from the 'oldtimers'.

http://breakingup.net/support/index.php?showforum=9

**Alysser** · 02-11-2008, 03:47 PM

I think this is a REALLY good idea. It's a great way to vent about someone.

Dear Kelly,

I am really sick of all the drama you've caused with me and my friends since Christmas. You are being such a freakin' B**** and you really need to get over whatever you're mad at. If you hate us all SO much why can't you just leave our lunch table!? STOP causing so much unnecessary crap. If you still expect me to apologize to you it's NOT going to happen, I refuse to apologize for something I didn't do. When Sarah tried to say she was sorry you ignored her. That's your problem, there is nothing more anyone can do. I'm sick of you getting everyone else in the middle of your stupid problems. STOP talking about people, stop holding grudges, and just get over it. If you find that SO hard then just leave us all alone!

From your EX-friend,
alyssa

**lizbud** · 02-11-2008, 04:37 PM

This seems like a good place to just vent in a letter to someone in our
lives, right? We don't have to like solve each others problems, or whatever,
do we? Sounds like an interesting thread.

**The_Duck** · 02-11-2008, 05:02 PM

Mom and Dad,

I'm writing this because it seems that what I want to say never really comes out right and, honestly, if it did... I don't think you would listen.

I know how big a deal this is, my wanting to go see her. She lives on the other side of the country and never before have we met face-to-face. I know you're wondering why, why this is so important to me. Why I had to pick such a huge leap outside my comfort zone, versus a tiny step. I've always been afraid, afraid to do anything without you. To go anywhere. And now... now I want to hop on a plane by myself and fly to San Diego. We've never even been to California. And I know that it scares you to death.

I know that there are hundreds of things that could go wrong. I'm aware of the risks and the possibility that the unthinkable could happen. It's a dangerous world out there. You keep telling me, and I keep telling you... I get it. I watch TV, too, you know. I've read the paper and I've seen the news. I know that a good portion of mankind is unspeakibly evil. I know that it's dangerous, but the entire world is dangerous. California isn't the only home to psychoes in this world. They are everywhere, and we can't all just hide under a rock. I told you that the other day and you replied "You do! Or at least you did!" And It's true. I've always been afraid of change, of all things new. But my world has been expanding as of late. I know, and so do you. I've seen it in your eyes when you look at me. Your baby girl is growing up and you're desperately trying to hold on. But, mom...dad... you can't hold on forever.

I know the risks that I'd be taking. I've weighed them in my mind and even visualized some of the atrocities that are possabilities, and still... I'm willing to go. I just need you to be willing to let me. I'm not asking you for anything but an "okay" and a ride to and from the airport. I've got the money for the tickets, I've got the days and the flights all picked out. It's a go on her end and still you refuse me this one thing. "I'm not responsible enough," is what you tell me. It seems as though my lack of a desire to drive, my complete absence of a desire to go to college, and the fact that I have no job is somewhow related to a flight across the country. You tell me that if I were to do these things, that maybe then you'd think I was ready. But what you fail to understand is that I can't. I have no confidence in myself to drive, as a matter of fact... I'm terrified of it. I have never had a desire to go to school beyond High School and have no idea what I want to do with the rest of my life. And a job... What would I do? People terrify me, you know that. I can't just pick something and run with it. I can't do a job that I'm not happy in and where do I find a job that affords me the space from people that I need?

No... I have no confidence in me. You tell me, you tell me that you know I can do these things. But me? I don't know that. I tried to explain it to you, that I think this is what I need. My world expanded so much after that missions trip to Mississippi. I gained confidence to do new things that I never in my life thought I would do. How much more confidence will I gain from this trip? You talk like what you want from me has to come before, but what if this trips makes it possible in the after? What if this testing of my wings is what I need to assure myself that I can fly?

You tell me that she's a stranger. It never seems to matter that I've known her for 6 months. That we talk over the internet every night and often call each other. No... she's no stranger. She's my best friend. My sister of the heart. And I love her. I love her so much. When the days are dark, she is my sunlight. When my world feels like it's cracking, she is the glue that holds me together. I need her. Often I don't even know how down I am, until her name pops up and a simple 'Hello' sends me flying high.

You said to me the other day that "You know how much this means to me." But I don't think it's true. Because if you even knew a fraction of how much this means to me, you'd never even consider saying 'no'. It's all I think about and dream about... that moment when I no longer have to settle for an electronic hug across the miles, but can feel her arms around me. When we can snuggle up on her couch and watch a movie side-by-side, instead of on a phone across a time zone and thousands of miles.

And the worst part is.. I don't feel I can even talk about it anymore. About wanting to go and how much she means to me, not even about good times we've had. Sometimes I can almost see you cringe when I mention her name, and it hurts me. Oh, how it hurts me. It's almost like you're jealous that we're so close, just beacuse you can't understand it. You know... I bought her a birthday present the other day, and I hid it from you because I thought you'd get mad at me. There's more on my list, but I won't ask you to take me. You wouldn't understand.

But I've got until June and I'm going to keep on trying. And if June comes and goes, I'll mail those presents anyway and just keep on trying for next year. And if that goes by, I will try for the next. And then maybe one of these days you'll really and truly see, just exactly what she means to me.

You said that if you let me go and something were to happen to me, that you'd never be able to forgive yourself. And what I'm reading in there is that what this all comes down to... is how you feel. It's like what I feel doesn't even come into play. But I thought you should know that, what I feel is... You might not be able to forgive yourselves if you let me go, but I don't know if I'll be able to forgive you if you make me stay.

~ Danny

**Chilli** · 02-11-2008, 05:15 PM

Thanks for making this thread.

I've been needing to vent this out for a while now, but didn't want to start a whole thread just for myself.

Dear former-friend,

First off, I want to say that I am glad you have turned your back on me. Thanks for making me realize what I have been putting myself through.

I am sick and tired of trying to ignore you when it comes to the puppy mill you and your parents run. Its disgusting. You are lucky that your family gives the dogs the bare necessities(even-though thats the only thing you give them), or else you wouldn't have that money-making hellhole to fall back on.
I won't miss your opinions. How you said, in your own words, "Just because you are rich, doesn't mean you have to spend it on stupid things." We're not rich, we're comfortable. All because my parents wanted to rise above what people expected of them. They went to college instead of taking the easy path of settling for something less than the best. You think spending money on things I love is stupid. The other day you told me "You already have like a million longboards, why are you buying another?" So badly I wanted to reply back asking why you continue to buy/breed dogs when your family owns "like, a million". What are we supposed to spend our money on? Breeding crappy dogs? Not in a million years.

I feel like a wasted a portion of my life these past 5 years, but I'm glad you finally pushed me far enough to realize how useless and degrading you are.

Don't forget: What goes around comes around.

All my best,
Your former friend.

**dukedogsmom** · 02-11-2008, 08:02 PM

Dear So Called Friend,
You betrayed me at the very worst time in my life. When I lost Duke, I felt my world falling down around me. Due to your actions, you made my life even more difficult and hard to bear. I will never forgive myself for confiding certain things to you. You are an unwelcome guest in my most favorite place. I finally know that you aren't a friend and never were. Thanks for letting me find out the hard way. I won't be fooled again by you.

**ILoveMyAbbyGirl** · 02-11-2008, 09:46 PM

I'm so glad this thread took off well. =] Let it out people, it helps TREMENDOUSLY.

Dear Bosco,

I know you're a chihuahua puppy and those two both equal highstrung, and we're only dog-sitting you for a week, but really. My cats don't like you. No use in running as fast as you can down the hallway and tackling them. They're the same size as you and when they hiss, it doesn't mean they're happy.

Love,
Your calm, patient, dog-sitter.

---

Dear Wisconsin,

It's cold. I hate you.

No love,
Disgruntled Wisconsinite

---

Dear Justin,

You told me you had a surprise visit planned. You were finally going to come visit me! After all the times you told me you'd come to Wisconsin, I finally believed you might actually make it this time. Then, today, you sent me a text message that said, "Sorry, I can't come visit like I had planned. I have to take Matt to Kansas City to the airport. I'm really sorry."

Once again, I get let down. Matt has a girlfriend, why can't SHE take him? But no, you have to go be the bigger man and ruin OUR plans to take him to the airport.

Oh well. I should know better than to expect that much out of you.

Not-really-much love,
Meg

**ILoveMyAbbyGirl** · 02-11-2008, 09:50 PM

Originally Posted by lizbud

This seems like a good place to just vent in a letter to someone in our
lives, right? We don't have to like solve each others problems, or whatever,
do we? Sounds like an interesting thread.

No, you don't have to solve anyone's problems. It's just a thread to get it off your chest, with it being obvious or anonymous. It's ALLLLL venting, lol.