Why make the choice to not have children?

[Kfamr]

I'm afraid to say anything here, as it seems those with different opinions get an angry attitude from some.

But, in my opinion and my opinion only...

-Raising a child is just like a dog, but far more complicated.
-You teach a dog wrong from right, as you do a child.
-You feed a dog and supply it with the care it needs, as you do a dog.
-You train a dog, resulting in a well-behaved animal, just like a child.
-You blame an owner for a misbehaved dog -- the same thing should go for children. Of course, there are naturally born 'bad apple' dogs, as there is children who are born 'bad apples'
-You clean up after a dog - feces, drool... etc.. -- the same for a child.
-You control your dog when it is running around and misbehaving -- same for a child...

Get my point?


Threads about children always make me feel bad, since i'm a child myself and it's like i'm some sort of sin for being born... because my parents chose to have me.



One day, I hope to have children. Wether they are adopted or not, that will be left up to my partner and I to decide. I personally would rather not go through the physical and emotional pain of having one myself.
And, just like when someone buys a dog from a breeder (i've seen some compare buying a dog to having a child) Although i'd much rather see a dog adopted, i'm still happy for that dog to have a loving caring home.

The only time I'm against someone having a child is if they are not able to afford financially and emotionally for another life. (and of course if they're far too young and children themselves)

[trayi52]

Kay, I find nothing you said to be insulting in anyway! You made and excellent point in everything you said. We as parents love our children, and we love our pets too. Your Simba and Nala are like your children. You have respect for the life of children and animals alike. Good for you!

Willie

[tuxluvr]

This thread made me think of my own parents....and I started another on "general" if anyone is interested...enjoy



http://petoftheday.com/talk/showthre...threadid=48612

[trayi52]

I have seen your thread, tuxluvr, and found it to be very beautiful! Thank you so much for starting that thread.

Willie

[sirrahbed]

Originally posted by Kfamr

Threads about children always make me feel bad, since i'm a child myself and it's like i'm some sort of sin for being born... because my parents chose to have me.

Sounds like your parents have done a good job of raising you and you do not sound like a child. You express your self well. I have three grown children myself and in particular, a 19 year old daughter who dearly loves her cat - very much the way you seem to love your animals. Her cat is very much her "baby" and is spoiled rotten. But when the time comes for her to have her own flesh and blood child which she wants so much - THIS is a lifetime commitment that never ends. It will change who she is *forever*. The young woman she is today, will simply not exist in quite the same way - ever again. In all likelihood, like me, she will then become a grandmother and a great-grandmother - and so forth. Being a mother means helping to mold and shape another personality, a person who will hopefully go on to become a contributing member of our society and carry on life and humanity as we know it.
There are some *similarities* between training a child and training a pup - such as you mentioned, yes. But to parents who "chose to have you" as you said - this is world of difference than going out to adopt a dog, cat, bird, rat, reptile, etc. Animals can become members of the family and the givers and recipients of amazing love, but they will never be *above* a human being.

[trayi52]

Very well said, Debbie!

[lisalee]

Yes, I'm outspoken on my views of animals being treated much less than children/human beings. I'm an animal advocate and very proud of it, there are many more who also share my views. In fact, there were many posters on this board who stated very similar to me there views on children. But that was ok, right?? I was the one picked to be singled out and lashed out at. I find many of your comments to be very offensive and it SHOWS me that you must want to start trouble with anyone that doesn't share your views.

Yes, to the young girl who wanted to know if I would rescue the kittens in the burning building. You better believe I would! Would you let them burn over the child??? I find that to be a very cruel statement!

I've met so far some very nice people on this board and some not so pleasant individuals I see. Enough said.

Lisa & Sash

[Corinna]

Well this thread is going to let me maybe surprize a few with my story. I didn't want any kids and I told hubby about it when we were dating. He said the same things as most of you. But I was very sure as I had inherited my fathers german timper. They called me corky at school cuz I would go off like a cork . Didn't take much for me to get pi$$ of. All went as planned (my plan) till 3 years of marrage I found the 2% of failerue on the pill . My daughter was born, 22 months later my son arrived another pill failure. Not that I failed they did. I was so scared I wouldn't be alone for months with my daughter (my mom and her are very bonded as a result cuz she was there to help me so much) I can't say I didn't lose it but never to what I thought I would(I thought I would be a physical abuser) I never did hit them . I did find I like kids at the age of 2 (i know most people don't like them then ) then each year after I enjoyed them more even as teens (crazy i know) . If I was to do it over I don't know if I would change it or not(glad i don't have to make that descion. ) I enjoy spoiling the neices and nephews ,will grandchildren if any ever appear but that is the kids choices.
I do try to make them very aware of the chances of family inherited diabetes . Had I known the history that would energe from the 2 families I would have been more likly to not have had them. 5 of the 6 grandpaernts are 2 on insulin, I have it . one or both of mine by 30 will have the disease. I tried to ward it off by really drilling good nutriation . After son was born hubby went for the neutering. It was a volentary thing as a gift to me since I went through the births.
Mydaughters birth was hard 18 hours but son was 4 and like having a bad case of gas no pain. (that came later as he grew up.)
I think it is a persons choice and no one should pressure any one in to it.
parenting is no picnic and like pet ownership its a life time commitment. Like willie says you still worry and pray for them constantly.

Jen I would like to know how at 20 you were able to have the problem fixed? Here in less you have a medical problem they will not do it. I would have if that were the case. Are our countries that much different?

[trayi52]

Now you are saying you would actually leave a child in a burning building and just save the animals?!

Let me tell you, everybody in this thread was very decent about their explaination on why they did not want children. They never said they would leave one to die!

[lisalee]

I NEVER said such a thing, now did I?? Willie my boy you are putting words in my mouth.


Lisa & Sash

[Miss Meow]

Originally posted by trayi52
Now you are saying you would actually leave a child in a burning building and just save the animals?!

Let me tell you, everybody in this thread was very decent about their explaination on why they did not want children. They never said they would leave one to die!

Willie, lisalee said nothing about leaving children in a burning apartment. Sirrahsim raised that analogy and lisalee responded by saying it's a cruel statement.

Maybe we should all stick to the original question as this is starting to turn into a child-bashing (figuratively, I mean) thread.

[Edit: oops, posted at the same time as lisalee ]

[trayi52]

Then lisalee, you should explain yourself a little further, and not leave it as if you would!

I am not a boy, I am a proud mother, and grandmother! When you say something don't just leave it like you are going to be inhuman about the whole thing!

Nicole, go back and read her other post!

[Sirrahsim]

Originally posted by lisalee
Yes, to the young girl who wanted to know if I would rescue the kittens in the burning building. You better believe I would! Would you let them burn over the child???

Yes. If I was put into this situation I would save the human child and let the kittens burn. I find it repulsive and very, very, very sad that you would even consider saving the kittens and leaving the child to die. Perhaps you misunderstood my post-go back and read it. I asked if you could save one or the other, which would you save? You stated that you would save the kittens. That means that you would let the child die. I am very, very, very sorry that you feel that way. Perhaps you had a bad experience as a child, but that is not a reason to allow a human child to die when you had the opportuinity to save her and decided to save soem animals instead.
Your statements have mostly been very disturbing to me and I only hope that you will never be my neighbor. If my child was in one room and my cats in the other, and you saved my cats and knowingly let my child die... You better believe that I would press charges and see to it that legal action was taken...

[Twisterdog]

I find it sad that kids/babies are placed so much higher in society than animals. I find people to be selfish that can't open there hearts to let an animal into there home. I find them to be the most selfish.

And I find you to be frightening and small-minded.

[Kfamr]

Can we not put personal attacks towards eachother?

That's why I was afraid to post.