Thursdays #20 - Hurricane Watch

[RICHARD]

lol!!!

Gini,

NO!! I was behaving!!!!! Honestly!!!

A wench outfit? Who's being naughty now?

How's about a rum runner?? of a hurricane???

MOFF,

A CVC and hot onion rings!!!

There is a place in Burbank with a sign that says
"Homemade Onion Rings".....they serve you in a brown paper lunch bag that turns greasy in about two seconds!!! my only gripe is having to keep opening little packets of ketchup to keep up!!

[slick]

OK, I don't get this at all. Last night before I left for home Richard had 1999. Now he's down to 1993. What gives?? Were my eyes playing tricks on me??

Arrrrrr, a warm welcome to all ye on Richard's Day. Gather yer shipmates and we all meet in the special galley to honour a very special Pet Talker. It's 2,000 drinks for Richard, whom today we shall call "Captain Morgan". And if ye like ye can throw in some pieces of gold and bid on the map to the buried treasure. Drink up maties!

[catland]

RRRRichard - Have you ever tried Onion Rings with mustard? I understand you have mustard at home.

[gini]

Richard, a rum runner? What does he look like?

Ohh, onion rings and ketchup............my mouth is watering.

My grandma years ago, gave me a great beer batter onion rings recipe.

[slick]

Originally posted by catland
RRRRichard - Have you ever tried Onion Rings with mustard? I understand you have mustard at home.

Ahhhh, but was it Grey Poupon???

[RICHARD]

lolololol,

I almost fell for that one!!!

No, nothing but CATsup on my Onion Rings!!!

why do i post stuff like that????? I'll never live it down

Slick,

ARRGGGGHHHH!

Matey,

Someone's been stealing my posts!!!!! We'll make them walk the plank at the end of my cutlass!!!!!

and I'm still waiting for some pirate jokes, too!!


Gini,


He's not the 'TOTAL MAN'....
if you can get past the eyepatch, hook hand, peg leg and the parrot dodo on his shoulder you can thank me!!!

[slick]

A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"What do you mean?" the pirate replies, "I'm fine."
The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."
"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."
"Well," says the pirate, "One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye."
"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit!"
"Well," says the pirate, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet."
_________________________________________________
This pirate walks into a bar with a big ship's wheel down his pants. The bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but do you know you have a ship's wheel down the front of your pants?"
And the pirate says...
Aaargh, it's driving me nuts!!

[RICHARD]

Originally posted by slick
The only pirate jokes I know are not fit for this forum, so I leave that up to someone else.

why was the insubordinate pirate thrown in the brig???


because he only had one 'AYE' (eye)...



hey slick.....16 and counting!!!!

I have my "AYE" on you!

[slick]

Originally posted by RICHARD
hey slick.....16 and counting!!!!I have my "AYE" on you!

I thought about that when I was in the shower this morning, not that I think about you in the shower,, oh shut up Vic before you stick another foot in.....

Wouldn't dream of taking this day away from you. This is your day my friend. I'll have mine in due time.

[gini]

You know you want to read some pirate jokes....



1
Have you heard about the new pirate movie?
It?s rated AARRRRGGH!

2
What's a pirate's favorite mode of transportation?
A cAARRRRGGH!

3
what's a pirate's favorite letter of the alphabet?
arrrr

4
what's a pirate's favorite kind of socks?
arrrrgyle

5
what is a pirates favorite study subject?
arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt.

6
what's a pirate's second-choice job?
an arrrrrrchitect!

7
This pirate walks into a bar with a big ship's wheel down his pants. The bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but do you know you have a ship's wheel down the front of your pants?"
And the pirate says...
Aaargh, it's driving me nuts!!

8
a little kid with a speech impediment dresses up as a pirate and goes trick or treating. he knocks on the door of a house and a man answers. "oh, i can see you're dressed up as a pirate." the man says. "but where are your buccaneers?" the kid gets really mad, and says "on the sides of my buckin' head!"

9
how much did the pirate pay to get his ears pierced?
a buccaneer

10
what's a pirate's favorite kind of cookie?
ships ahoy

11
what do you call a pirate that skips class?
captain hooky!

12
A pirate walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Hey, I haven't seen you in a while. What happened, you look terrible!"
"What do you mean?" the pirate replies, "I'm fine."
The bartender says, "But what about that wooden leg? You didn't have that before."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in a battle at sea and a cannon ball hit my leg but the surgeon fixed me up, and I'm fine, really."
"Yeah," says the bartender, "But what about that hook? Last time I saw you, you had both hands."
"Well," says the pirate, "We were in another battle and we boarded the enemy ship. I was in a sword fight and my hand was cut off but the surgeon fixed me up with this hook, and I feel great, really."
"Oh," says the bartender, "What about that eye patch? Last time you were in here you had both eyes."
"Well," says the pirate, "One day when we were at sea, some birds were flying over the ship. I looked up, and one of them shat in my eye."
"So?" replied the bartender, "what happened? You couldn't have lost an eye just from some bird shit!"
"Well," says the pirate, "I really wasn't used to the hook yet."

13
why does a pirate's phone go beep beep beep beep beep?
because he left it off the hook!

14
what does a pirate say when he takes over santa's job?
ho ho ho and a bottle of rum

15
What does a vegan pirate do in jail?
Starrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrve!

16
What has 8 arms and 8 legs?
8 Pirates!


Well, Slick, you asked for it!!

[slick]

You must have done the same as I did - thank goodness for google!!!

[gini]

Vicki, the counter isn't tallying up your posts correctly either.

You have 1986 - and that keeps appearing..........even when you add more posts.

(Richard, are you paying attention? - 1986 - only 12 to go).

[catland]

Long ago, when sailing ships ruled the waves, a captain and his crew were in danger of being boarded by a pirate ship. As the crew became frantic, the captain bellowed to his First Mate, "Bring me my red shirt!" The First Mate quickly retrieved the captain's red shirt, which the captain put on and lead the crew to battle the pirate boarding party. Although some casualties occurred among the crew, the pirates were repelled.

The men sat around on deck that night recounting the day's events when an ensign looked to the Captain and asked, "Sir, why did you call for your red shirt before the battle?" The Captain, giving the ensign a look that only a captain can give, exhorted, "If I am wounded in battle, the red shirt does not show the blood, and thus you men will continue to fight unafraid." The men sat in silence, marveling at the courage of such a man.

The next morning, the lookout screamed that there were two pirate vessels sending boarding parties. The crew cowered in fear, but the captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my red shirt!" Once again, the battle was on, and the Captain and his crew repelled both boarding parties, though this time more casualties occurred. Later that day, however, the lookout screamed that there were pirate ships, 10 of them, all with boarding parties on their way. The men became silent and looked to the Captain, their leader, for his usual command. The Captain, calm as ever, bellowed, "Bring me my brown pants!"

[slick]

Catland I'm laughing so hard I'm crying.....

Gini: thanks, but ignore my counter. This is Richard's day.

[zippy-kat]

The counts are down because someone deleted a few threads. That be thar reason!

Rich, I'm hungry but I don't know what I want yet. It's cold here so something lovely and warm and cheeeezeey.

I have star bucks coffee made for those who have a hang over from yesterday...