I'm going to give this a try...

[aly]

If you have any paper bags and can make Toby get in one, that might make Lily come play with him Thats how she and Shiloh first started playing.

[Barbara]

Cats usually won't meet and just be friends. To me all this sounds pretty normal. They are already eating side by side -and look sooooo cute together -this is already a large progress.

The open mouth thing is a kind of smelling: cat's have something called Jacobson's organ and they use that when they meet interesting smells like pee of an unknown cat etc.

No idea about the panting.

Just let them have time. they're on their way

[taopjlcpg]

http://www.lovethatcat.com/cat-toys-mouse.html
this toy really helped my babies.
it gave them something else to focus on rather than each other.
a common interest
even though u just have 2, i promise it's important to get toby the first attention, cats r pretty funny about "the baby" getting all the attention.....i even take one at a time occasionally to sleep alone w/ me at night
depending on if anyone in particular seems stressed
it was good with lily, but toby will need it to...kind of like a jealous sibling thing
let them do their socializing as they are....sometimes nature has to take its course...they will adjust luv the pixs

[ScantyNebula]

Alyson sent me that toy .. its so cute! Toby hasn't played at all since Lily showed up. He just sits and wathces her play as if to say "you mean to tell me you fall for that stuff?" hehe Lily's fav toys are mice or balls filled with beads or something .. she hasn't been too interested in the microchip mouse so far. She is a VERY VERY playful kitten - Toby was never like that. At the sound of a toy she comes running and can stay playing with one toy for so long

[aly]

Hi Johanna -

I've been trying not to bug you so you could take a few days to get better from your flu and get Lily settled in. How are things going now? I hope Lily and Toby's relationship is progressing smoothly.

I tried to pm you the other day but your box is full.

[ScantyNebula]

Hi, I"m feeling back to myself now .. I don't have time to update you tonight because I am in the middle of working ... I will update you tomorrow! My pm box is not full now I think.

[ChrisH]

Scanty, I just catching up with the Lily & Toby tale and pictures and was sorry to read you were sick and so pleased that you are now feeling better!
Lovely pictures of Toby & Lily, they are both so beautiful. The only things I know about cats are what I have learned here on PT so I haven`t any advice, anyway, seems they are getting on somewhat now and you don`t need it!
Please keep posting pictures and keeping us updated on the Toby & Lily antics when you can. Kisses and scritches to them both.

Chris