Hello everyone..
I had to.. take some time, then now I can post this.... so, yeah.. to take it all in and realize that this really happened. I'm actually alright for the most part. It was expected.. he was dying.. slowly, and I just did NOT think it would happen NOW rather than later, but you know what.. he was suffering for the most part. I thank God that he was able to rest easy and pass away in his sleep last night at 1:25AM. My mom said that Papa said he was ready and if he COULD NOT be where he was 6 months ago, then he was ready..
I just think it was just.. wow, I hate the 4th of July weekend. I really do. My grandmother passed away on the 3rd.. and my brother's HS grad party was LAST NIGHT, and you know, I just think my grandpa waited until the right moment and left this world.
My mom and uncle went over to the hospital to see him last night, and you know, my uncle got arrested, got a DUI, and he was driving both of them. The cop was so HEARTLESS. I don't care, if I was there, I would've *(#U$(*#$# punched him. I'm sorry. My mom was crying and they both were saying that their dad was dying.. and the cops were like, "So what, can't do anything about it..." and they wanted to be there before he did. Such a.. you know, I will shut my mouth over this issue. My mom made it there but my uncle was put in a toll booth... and missed that moment. He couldn't even say goodbye. So he has this huge guilt over that.
I was thinking about going to see him this morning, but, I realized.. I did not want to.. and I'm glad I didn't. The last time I saw him was on Father's Day and he was happy to be around everyone. That was what I wanted to remember him by, laughing and smiling, and he was doing so great, then after that it was just.. going downhill. I don't know, I'm still angry but so upset at the same time that it couldn't been prevented. I don't know. It all started with an infection but I guess that was God's plan all the way to bring him home.
I was at Mike's for the night, and at that same time, I started crying so hard, because I just got a feeling but I didn't want to call home and to see if Papa was still OK, so, I did not find out until this morning when Mike brought me home. Mike is wonderful, he's been with me quite a bit over the weekend. He just recently left, and he wasn't sure if I would be OK and I told him to go home and I will be fine, it will take a while. I just think it's insane, how I've been with him and this happened. I just think that my grandma did really put him in my life for a reason.
So.. yeah.. I'm doing OK for the most part, but I still get really emotional. I have been emotional the last week and now all this week.. I am going to be exhausted.
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Prayers are on the way.
Originally Posted by CountryWolf07
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