Alex is gone, and my heart is breaking

[jennielynn1970]

Ok, so I received a call from our shelter administrator on Sunday and she asked me if I could pick up a cat from the Emergency Vet since I lived really close by and she didn't want him stuck there because we were expecting a large snow storm. Sure, I said, and went to pick up Aramingo, the cat that was supposedly taken to the vet.

So, I'm there, and they're telling me that they couldn't find anything wrong with him, except for the fact that his white cell count was 39,000, and both of his protein counts were high as well. Nothing else was said, just that "oh he's so sweet" and I went on my way.

I get home, open the carrier (they gave him to me in the carrier while I waited in the lobby), and I pull out... NOT ARAMINGO. I'm looking at this cat and thinking, there is no way this is the cat it was supposed to be. Aramingo is large and chubby and is polydactly. This cat was medium sized, lanky and had only 5 toes per foot. Also, this cat WAILS like a fire engine! I know that wail, I thought, and the drippy eye!!! This is ALEX from the shelter. Yes, they are both in the same room but except for them both being black cats, they are totally different.

So, I put Alex on the floor and he's very wobbly. He was very disoriented, and he was walking in circles. It was very odd. Plus there was a LARGE bump on his forehead. No one at the ER said anything about him walking funny or much other than "There's a bump on his forehead". They were looking for signs of a UTI, because Aramingo gets blocked. Alex, however, does not have that issue, so they didn't pay attention to anything else.

I then heard from another volunteer that he possibly fell from the loft in his room at the shelter. The loft is a good 9ft off the floor. She said that they heard a thump, then there was water spilled all over the floor, Alex was all wet, and a towel from the loft was on the floor as well. They said Alex was just sitting there, and so they thought nothing of it. No one noted it in the log book either....

Then just last night I heard that another volunteer was concerned that Alex was wailing/screaming so loudly in the loft the day before. The one woman who runs the shelter wasn't concerned. The volunteer went in to his room, pulled him out of the loft and he quieted down immediately.

Alex has wailed like this for as long as I can remember going there. His eyes have always been runny as well. We were always just told "Oh, that's just Alex, that's how he talks." If I could get a better video, and get the sound on it, I'm telling you, you'd know immediately that this was not just talking. This is distress!!!!

So, I take him to my vet. I love my vet office. He turns off the light and is looking at Alex and says, "Well, I doubt that he sees anything at all. His cataracts are so thick, I can't see through them with this light or anything!"

So... how long was he blind? I don't know. How long since he had even been looked at or had an exam where they looked at his eyes?! I thought that the ER people would do a general H&P, check ears, teeth, eyes, etc.. and rule things out. I guess not.

So, Alex is not going back to the shelter. I will not subject him to being scared and the risk of falling and possibly breaking his neck or doing some horrible damage to himself.

What I don't know is how to really deal with a blind, and partially deaf, older cat. I'm trying to keep the room free from clutter in the middle. I'm blocking off corners because he tends to find them and then cant' get out of them and wails and wails till I come running to get him. Poor thing ended up in a cat carrier, couldn't figure out where he was, didn't turn around and go out and wailed in there. It's just so sad!!!! My other foster, Frankie, is in there and he's very sweet with him. Alex isn't too thrilled at the moment, but they are very good with one another.

I'm going to attach a video of Alex walking. I also think it's a conditioned response as well because he had less than 4x3 ft square to walk around in for the past 4+ years. It's like the size of the circle is what he knew was safe, and that's all he does. It's always counter clockwise, and about the same size. It's just sad. I want to cry just watching him. He lets me hold him and cuddle him and he purrs and warbles these cute meows to me (not a wail at all, but a normal kitty sound).

If you can suggest anything, I'd really appreciate it. I'm just at a loss as to how to get him to acclimate easier to the room and to know that he is safe.

Alex (black cat in photo)



Video, poor quality

[DrKym]

Jenn,
My Io is blind and brain damaged from being thrown from a car as a kitten.
All I can tell you is it will take some time. We obviously do not move furniture around much. We also were told by our vet to use treats as a smelly safe line.
It has worked well, he has completely figured out the whole house downstairs. He is a total lap cat upstairs because the remodeling throws him off.
Now he is a bit less inclined to run up and meet new kitties, he prefers to let them come to him, and he still sometimes will bump into things but not often.

I wish you well with this boy, and if I can help with any other things about a blind wonderguy, let me know!

Kym

[Freedom]

Oh Jenn, how wonderful of you to take in this kitty!!! So the shelter has let you adopt him permanently? He's been in a cage at the shelter for 4 YEARS??? And no one recognized that he is blind? Oh the poor poor baby!!

I don't have experience with a blind cat, but I would agree with Kim that is it going to take him time to adjust to a normal living situation. My Cuddles was in a cage at the shelter for 18 months, she has no health issues, and it took her over a week to adjust to a room! Never mind an entire house, that was way too much, overwhleming for her. So he needs some boundaries so he can explore and figure out where he is at any given time.

Pick one room for him, place litter, food and water bowls and try not to relocate them on him. Also a bed. Those things will help him learn "7 steps from the bed to the litter box," and "5 steps from the litter box to the water dish." Instead of an entire room, you may even want to section it off for a start.

ER will only look at what they are told is the possible problem. They do not take in anything else, assuming that is being taken care of by the primary. It is the same for humans in the ER.

the pacing sounds exactly like what caged animals do at zoos! Poor, poor kitty.

Did your vet mention, can cats have cataract surgery, as dogs can?

Your post left me wondering, was Aramingo still at the ER vet???

Sandra

[KitCat]

You are a wonderful person and I am sure with your caring and patience the kitty will know he is safe.

[jenluckenbach]

Poor Alex. He will be so much better once he learns his new place.

Just to answer some questions, Aramingo was NEVER at the ER. Whoever took this (black) cat in to the ER did not know which cat they had.

And Alex was not caged. Our shelter has "rooms", but his room is very small. There is lot of verticle space (shelf upon shelf, up each of the walls and then an over head loft), but the floor space is minimal. This is one room in our shelter that I do NOT like. I feel the cats in there NEVER get to run. And come on, let's be real, ALL cats, no matter what the age, want to run at some times.

So Alex must have found his way up to the loft and then fallen off the edge onto the floor.

As far as advice for helping him, I have none. The only cat I ever had who was blind had lived here many years before he wnet blind, so her knew the area and the other cats. He adusted on his own.

Good luck with that sweet boy.

[emilysgk]

Oh that poor boy! Im glad you have him now. I just dont see how no one noticed this sooner? Im sure he will adjust in time. I have no experience with blind cats, only a dog. I rescued her from a breeding kennel!! She always done quite well and in time knew her home very well. She would even get excited and jump around, it was the cutest thing. (I found a home with a sweet lday who can't have kids, spoiled rotten)

Maybe encourage him with treats or something to walk farther in a strait line? Maybe that will help him realize that he has more freedom. I just feel so bad for him. I cant imagine being in a small room, that he can only go up in and he couldnt see a thing. I know he is in a good place now, im sure it wont take long for him to figure it all out.

[critters]

Poor guy--it's a shame he was cooped up in such a small place he learned to circle. So sad.

I don't know that a 1-level place is necessary for him, although stairs having a "side rail" or being rather enclosed might be (given his history of falling, open stairs might not be a good idea. Mine have about 6 inches of a kitty-sized wall down the open side). Spunk, my blind punk, does stairs beautifully, and, since the stairs won't move, once he learns them he'll be set.

If he has light/dark vision, you might be able to set up a communication system with light flicks; otherwise, I'd continue the thump system you've already started. I suspect he'll be a lot better soon; the shelter seems like such a sensory- and exercise-deprived place given his disabilities.

I've found with more severely disabled (and/or more traumatized--Alex fits both) ones that once you "fill the love bucket" they usually become less clingy, more independent, and they usually go on to do normal kitty stuff.

[Medusa]

Sorry for the confusion. I must have been having a blonde moment. The crying part sounds exactly like Creamsicle. If she cries when I'm on the phone w/someone who doesn't know her, they'll say "Go take care of your baby." And when she gets panicky, good grief! She wails at the top of her lungs. When I first got her, she would turn around while she was eating (after the head movements calmed down) just to make sure I was there. So I'd sit right beside her so she could eat in peace, sweet girl. Anyhow...good luck and bless, bless and bless you.

Blessings,
Mary

[jennielynn1970]

Sorry for the confusion. I must have been having a blonde moment. The crying part sounds exactly like Creamsicle. If she cries when I'm on the phone w/someone who doesn't know her, they'll say "Go take care of your baby." And when she gets panicky, good grief! She wails at the top of her lungs. When I first got her, she would turn around while she was eating (after the head movements calmed down) just to make sure I was there. So I'd sit right beside her so she could eat in peace, sweet girl. Anyhow...good luck and bless, bless and bless you.

Blessings,
Mary

Oh the wailing sounds this boy makes!! It's enough to wake the dead!

He does do the turning around while eating, and his balance definitely seems off at times. What I've been doing is putting him right next to my body when I'm seated on the floor, putting a plate of wet food there for him (I've been putting some immune support and Wellactin in it once a day, just to give him a boost), and then I have my arm over him as he's eating. It doesn't have to touch him, but I think it gives him added stability. He sways a bit when he's just standing on his own eating the wet food. He's still knocking over the dry food bowls, so I'm going to change them to some of my low and wide baking dishes that I don't use. They're not big enough for me to bake in for groups, so I have been keeping them for water bowls for the guys upstairs. I'm also going to look at one of those elevated food and water bowls at PetSmart today as well. Not sure if that is needed, but want to check them out. He also likes the treats I got there that are supposed to calm him down. I had them for Frankie, and since they're both together, I've been using them with both boys. Not sure if the calming works but they like the flavor. I'm just hoping that there's nothing more neurologically wrong with him from the fall at this point as well.

[Medusa]

I hope not, too. It'll probably take a while before you get a routine going w/him but I have no doubt that you'll be able to. There's no limit to what love can do.

Blessings,
Mary

[jennielynn1970]

Well, I took Alex to a very well respected vet today that is at a "referral" center. From 8pm to 8am it's an ER and during the day it's a referral center. They cost a fortune, but have specialists there who are wonderful. He had some great insight about Alex, although I was hoping for something a little positive, but didn't get that at all.

What Dr. Ron concluded is that Alex has a tumor that started in his sinuses and has started eating away (his words) into his brain. He showed me how if it would be a brain injury from a fall, since the bump is on the right side of his head, his motor skills would be affected on the left side of the body. Unfortunately, his right side is majorly affected. He picked up Alex, and holding him in front of the exam table, moved him toward it. Now, the legs on the left side lifted up slightly. The right side, not at all. They just basically stayed limp. He said that the circling counterclockwise is another symptom of the damage to that side as well.

He doesn't recommend chemo, radiation or even surgery. He said that the chemo and radiation for the brain tumor wouldn't help his quality of life, and that if he tried to remove the tumor, Alex more than likely, wouldn't make it off the operating table.

He didn't say whether Alex is in pain. I wonder that. He is comforted when I hold him, and I could do that 24hrs a day if I was able to. Unfortunately, since I work all day, I can't do that. I even emailed some of the volunteers in our shelter to see if anyone was home, like retired, during the day, because he really needs more one on one care. So far, no bites

Alex is still at the vet. Dr. Ron wants to do some xrays and other things just to verify his diagnosis. I didn't want to leave him there overnight, because he's going to be so alone, but I can't be at home tomorrow to take him back to the vet. Darn job! We had off today because of snow, so that was a break for me, and I was glad to be able to stay with Alex. I just wish it would get really bad overnight and we'd have off again, but I'm sure that's not going to happen.

Keep Alex in your thoughts and prayers please. He's a sweet sweet boy who so does not deserve this. I'll figure out how to care for him, even if it means I take him to work with me (the principal can kiss my butt if he doesn't like it). I won't have him suffer and die alone.

Thanks for listening...

[Catty1]

Awww...Jenn...

Please PM Craftlady. I don't know how close you live to her...but her Thumper had an inoperable brain tumour also. Though I have no first-hand experience with it myself, Thumper's tumour is now "mushy"...after a couple of months.

Prayers for Alex...love that boy all you can...

And check with Craftlady....can't hurt. Maybe her Reiki person can do 'long-distance' with Alex, as she has had to do with Thumper because of bad weather.

{{{hugs}}}

[Medusa]

This is just the worst news. I'm so sorry about this. You're so right about not letting him be alone. He needs you. Lots of prayers and healing going out to Alex (and you) tonight.

Blessings,
Mary

[Lizzie]

Oh, Jenn, what heartbreaking news! Tears are pouring down my face and dripping onto Cattulus as I write. Does he also have cataracts or does his blindness have something to do with the tumor also? Perhaps both. The deafness, I assume, has something to do with the cancer? I remember caring for a baby with a head injury (she had been abused) and how distressing it was to hear her constant high pitched crying. At least holding Alex does comfort him and he knows you are there. I hope someone else can help with caring for him. If I lived closer and didn't also have a job, I'd volunteer like a shot. I adore black cats and he looks like such a sweetheart. Cats, as you know, cope with pain better than humans so as long as he is eating and enjoying your company he is still enjoying his life. You must have so wanted to make up to him for what he's been through so far, you are just going to have to squeeze in some extra-special care and adoration into a shorter time than you expected.

Can we send you any little luxuries that he would enjoy? A "Tiger Dreams" blanket? A buttercup bed? Special food? How is his sense of smell?

Keep posting, please, even though it will be hard for you to write and hard for us to read.

[krazyaboutkatz]

Jenn, I'm so sorry to hear this. I sure hope that you'll be able to keep him comfortable and care for him. He'll continue to be in my thoughts and prayers.