*sigh*

[popcornbird]

Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
Well now - "blessed" isn't exactly a word I'd use... But then again that's just me.

However... I think in this case it's a second marriage and he just had to have another baybee. Nevermind the fact that he's going to be geriatric by the time the kid is a freshman in college... Ugh. just... UGH.

Hey .. whatever.. It's not something I think is normal, but whatever floats his boat I guess.

Wow..........now this has to be the first time I've ever heard someone saying having a child isn't a blessing. I'm not exactly crazy about kids.........and can't stand some of them, because of their behavior, but still, there are some kids that I just adore and think to be the cutest little things. To be quite honest, that statement made me quite sad. To a parent, a child is their pride and joy.....a little person for whom they went through so much to get. If you don't like kids, that is fine, but to say kids aren't blessings to their parents is worse than someone saying pets aren't a blessing to those that love them. I know some people who talk about kids more than I would like to listen, but I wouldn't complain about them talking about something that means so much to them. I like to talk about my pets because they mean the world to me. No doubt, those children mean more than mountains of gold to their parents.

[ILoveReptiles]

Originally posted by popcornbird
Wow..........now this has to be the first time I've ever heard someone saying having a child isn't a blessing. I'm not exactly crazy about kids.........and can't stand some of them, because of their behavior, but still, there are some kids that I just adore and think to be the cutest little things. To be quite honest, that statement made me quite sad. To a parent, a child is their pride and joy.....a little person for whom they went through so much to get. If you don't like kids, that is fine, but to say kids aren't blessings to their parents is worse than someone saying pets aren't a blessing to those that love them. I know some people who talk about kids more than I would like to listen, but I wouldn't complain about them talking about something that means so much to me. I like to talk about my pets because they mean the world to me. No doubt, those children mean more than mountains of gold to their parents.

<edited for grammar>

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I just cannot be excited for someone when they've added yet another human being to an already atrociously overpopulated planet. The way I see it - a child is just another mass consumer of our already depleted natural resources.

Maybe their child means something to them, and that's great - I'm happy for them. But I can't honestly say that same child means anything to me. What's more, I refuse to pretend that I care when I really don't. Maybe that makes me heartless, but oh well... I am what I am.

I never expect people to get all excited over my pets. If they do then great. If they don't... that's their problem.

My pets mean the world to me - and that's all that should matter.

[guster girl]

wow

[CathyBogart]

What is such a blessing about doing something that almost everyone in this world will do at one point in their lives and stretching this planet even thinner than it already is?

I'm with ILR....When someone goes all placenta-brain like that my eyes stert to roll up into the back of my head as I try to figure out ANY way out of the conversation. I've lost a very dear friend because I flat-out told her (politely) that her baby didn't interest me and I didn't want it to be a large part of our friendhip. (As in, if she was coming over to my house for dinner the baby isn't welcome, etc.)

Here's a point that I'm going to make again....So many people here are so concerned about the overpopulation of unwanted pets. (Myself included!) A lot of us are very gung ho... "Adopt adopt adopt!!" Isn't it a bit hypocritical to say this and then not adopt skinkids too? There are so many in foster care. Don't breed, adopt! This is how we think of our dogs and cats, so why not ourselves? Especially since our own overpopulation problem is so much worse.

So what I'm trying to say is....I don't think babies are a blessing either. Now you've heard it twice!! *chuckles*

[aly]

There could be worse things in the world. What if they didn't care about their kids at all? That would be MUCH worse than caring so much to talk about them all the time.

We all have things we are proud of. I love my pets and drive people nuts talking about them nonstop. But that is who I am. I know if I ever had a baby, I would love the baby so much that I would constantly talk about him/her. Its a beautiful thing. I am glad that people enjoy it.

[CathyBogart]

Ah, but you see..I DON'T talk about my pets nonstop...precisely because I wouldn't want someone to do the same to me. About their pets, their kids, anything really. I like variety, and lots of it. My mind tends to be completely one-track, but each subject lasts about two weeks, so I don't think I drive anybody insane. (I certainly try not to!)

I censor myself for other people. If I know they're afraid of snakes I don't bring them up at all. I have a friend who feels that keeping ANY animal in captivity is cruelty, no matter what. So I keep my moth shut and we agree to disagree. I don't bring up my pagan religious views to my catholic family. I expect people to extend the same curtosy to me.

People need to expand their lives beyond children. There are more things in the world, and if someone's kids are their entire world...I feel bad for the kids!

If someone expressed to you that something you were talking about made them uncomfortable, would you continue to talk about it?

[ziron]

My grandma is the worst of this. We go into a store and she tells the cashier about oh yes my grandson just blah blah blah..and u know they don't care ..she does this everywhere its so very annoying

[ILoveReptiles]

Originally posted by aly
There could be worse things in the world. What if they didn't care about their kids at all? That would be MUCH worse than caring so much to talk about them all the time.

We all have things we are proud of. I love my pets and drive people nuts talking about them nonstop. But that is who I am. I know if I ever had a baby, I would love the baby so much that I would constantly talk about him/her. Its a beautiful thing. I am glad that people enjoy it.

Ok this speaks volumes to me - have you ever noticed that people either take one extreme or the other on this issue? It's either they don't care at all, or their overcaring to the point of obsessiveness, and the kid is the center pin of their universe.

These type of parents can't talk about, think about, or comprehend anything else. It's all about the kid. The kid this the kid that. It's NOT healthy! This is what is causing the kids today to have their distinctive superiority complex.

I have NO problem with the parents that are REASONABLE about their kids. It's the obsessive ones that bother me. I don't go around talking about my pets all the time either, and like WolfChan, I censor what I say around people whom I know do not like reptiles.

[catnapper]

Originally posted by ILoveReptiles
These type of parents can't talk about, think about, or comprehend anything else. It's all about the kid. The kid this the kid that. It's NOT healthy! This is what is causing the kids today to have their distinctive superiority complex.

You are quite right there! Too many kids today think they are invinsible/perfect/wonderful and can do anything because they are constantly being told they are wonderful. I am so tired of going to my daughter's school concerts and plays and having to listen to kids sing who are just AWFUL... but they sing because they've been told by doting parents that they are wonderful... then some day they'll try out for something like "American Idol" and hear the truth for the first time and - wow - its like the truth teller has lost their mind. So I agree with you there.

Note: I am not saying that its bad to have postive self-esteem... its bad when they feel/act as if they are the world's gift to everybody. That is not healthy. My own neice is a product of that... she's a masculine looking girl (sorry, but true) who's always been in sports and now that she's 16, she wanted to try out for the dance squad. She practiced and came up with a routine. She claims she was the best there. We know how she dances and all have our doubts. She confronted - yes confronted, as in accused- the coach and was told that she wasn't feminine enough. She was crushed. She walked around asking everybody for weeks if we thought she wasn't feminine... we all tried to "nicely" tell her that she was little rough; that just because you wear a skirt & some make-up doesn't mean you transform into girly-girl. She turned a deaf ear to the helpful tips.

Everyone has one thing in their lives that they are passionate about to the boredom of everyone else. I know someone who lives and breathes e-bay. Oh-so-annoying! Someone else does the same with sports... "can't we talk about something else... hey, I have an idea! No sports speak for an hour." Equally obnoxious. We all have our obsessions. Whether or not we are open and eager to share what makes us happy, makes the difference of whether or not you hear those fascinating teething ring stories. I agree that ongoing stories told day after day about somebody's baby is a bit grating on the nerves. So are the stories told day after day about sports, clothes, e-bay, you name it. Believe it or not, dating tales on Monday morning are just as bad as baby tales, going into depth about your new lipstick is equally terrifying... I'm assuming you don't do these things, but they are examples of what people endure in offices on a daily basis. I'm sure there's something you discuss that people roll their eyes on. If you don't then you are one in a million (either that or in denial... then you're going back to being raised to thinking you're invincible.)

[2kitties]

You're right Catnapper. I am a runner and when I first got started training, I bored my coworkers to tears. Thankfully, I got some running friends. Lord knows my non-running friends would never have stuck around. I was completley obnoxious!

[aly]

I can understand being slightly annoyed when someone talks a lot about something. But, if they are that passionate about it, there is no way I'd tell them to stop. It makes me happy to see other people happy. And I think its great when people talk about their kids all the time. My dad would start talking about me in the grocery store and sometimes it'd end up he was talking to someone I went to high school with I was embarrassed, but as I look back, I know that he loves me THAT much that he likes to talk about me to anyone.

I understand you guys don't like kids and you have your reasons. I just think that not everyone understands that though. I am sure they aren't just talking about their kids to try to annoy you.

I do censor myself around people who I know aren't interested in my pets. But my true friends would not want me to do that. Granted, you probably don't want to be the best of friends with your co-workers, but still.

I just saw a lot of hostility towards kids in this thread and I wanted to say that I DO think a baby is a complete blessing. And any child who is not thought of as one, I really feel for

I'm not trying to tell you guys you should start caring about other peoples' children. But at least try to see things from their view a little more.

[trayi52]

Aly that was very well said. I as a parent like talking about my kids, but I won't bore you with that since you don't like kids. But I assume when you were children you had parents that were very proud of you also, and loved talking about you.

Willie

[Logan]

Bravo to you, Aly and Willie! I will definitely think twice before I "brag" about my children on Pet Talk, after reading the other responses here. But I appreciate the fact the you two and a couple of others at least appreciate the joy that some parents and grandparents feel. It's those who don't get overjoyed that worry me (those that are parents/grandparents and don't find the joy and happiness in their kids).

I find joy in my pets and my children and I like to talk about them and tell others about them when I can. My family, furry, feathered and skin, are what make my life complete!! I can only hope that others would have the same satisfaction in time.

[pitbullmommy]

WOW!
i know i cant wait to have kids! I love children and i would talk about them everyday! It is a true blessing to have children. but then again that is just my opinion. I love children.

[CathyBogart]

Alikkon and my pets are what makes my life complete...but I don't gush about them constantly! I DO talk about school more than some people are interested in, methinks, but I try not to and I think I do a fair job.

Is a baby a "complete blessing" if it's born to a 16 year old mother still in HS who is not financially/emotionally prepared to deal with such a thing but keeps it anyways out of obligation? Is it a blessing if a woman stops taking the Pill so that she can force her boyfriend to marry her? Is it a blessing if a man get a woman pregnant without her consent to force her not to leave him, make her dependent on him? What if a couple is on welfare and struggling to survive? Homeless? Passes on some horrible genetic defect? Just don't have the common sense to raise a child that will be a decent addition to the human race? Has HIV?

Don't think that I don't appreciate being proud of accomplishments kids/pets have made, or just being proud of them in general. However, I don't give myself the illusion that everyone, or even most people, are interested in every new thing Chubby does, or the fact that Midori moulted and doubled in size.

It's not just proud parents either, Brian's SIL has a disgusting habit of telling me all about her kids' bodily functions. Potty training and spit-up make me want to gag! I don't sit there and tell her about the time Chubby regurgitated a rat pup into her water dish on a hot day! (Although perhaps I should)