Unhappy Calico

[MommaCat]

Dear new friends,
Thank you all for your warmth and caring regarding my flaky fuzzy. She has been out of the bathroom sink and pacing around the house. I cannot thank you all enough for your kindness and caring. It means so much to me.
If I Knew how to post pictures, I would post one of her peeking over the rim of the sink from last night. Clayton is in the basement.. looking out of the window, It's dark outside but that boy is still looking.
With all of your prayers, encouragement and support I know that Shadow will come around.....maybe before I die.. bit I know she'll come around
Clayton insists on playing with Momma in the middle of the night. He loves to sleep beween my legs. Jim said he must feel safe that way. He also likes to sleep on my stomach and chest. I am little so he keeps falling off! Does he bother his "daddy"?Noooooo he knows MOmma will put up with him. He has been so starved for love I don't have the heart to push him away. I pet him while I am asleep....our daughter slept thru the night better then he does! I have forgotten what it's like! Elizabeth is 21, so it's been a long time between being up in the middle of the night!

Lilith Cherry, what are you doing in China? Have you been there long and do you lik eit? We lived on Okinawa for 4 years and loved it.

BLessings Light an dlove to all of you!
MommaCat

[MommaCat]

Evening all,
Well Shadow came out of the bathroom sink for awhile.She followed us around. Then Clayton came upstairs from his "fort". He was a good boy. He laid under the kitchen table, then hopped on the family room sofa. Shadow was nowhere to be found. He got bored and has disappeared again. I looked and she is hiding behind the sofa.
No sounds from them...but she is the one that is now hiding, and she was the one that started this by growling and hissing at him.I think he'd like to be friends.
I am seriously thinking of drinking that RESCUE REMEDY myself!
KIDS! 2 or 4 legged! Our daughter never gave us the gray hairs like these two fuzzies are!
Gotta love 'em. Lord But I adore them all. If I could.. I'd have a houseful....
Mommacat

[jenluckenbach]

I am seriously thinking of drinking that RESCUE REMEDY myself

YES, A few of us have taken that route

It does sound like he WANTS to be friends. She'll melt in time.

[MommaCat]

Can I get the large economy size of RESCUE REMEDY for myself???


BLessings,
Momma Cat.

[Sweetie's Mom]

Hi Mommacat --

I had a similar situation with my alpha male cat when I brought 2 new cats into the house, the second one about 4 weeks after the first one. They were both rescue cats, one having lived outside for a while and had 4 babies that she finally showed to me. Anyway, I found homes for the babies and kept the mom and the alpha male cat didn't like that at all. It took MONTHS for them to learn to tolerate each other. When I brought the next cat into the house (who was about 5 weeks old at the time), about 4 weeks after the mom, my alpha male cat loved her. To see them together you would have thought my alpha male was its mother. Go figure.

Now, about 10 months later, the mom cat has made it clear that yes, she will stay in the same room with the alpha male cat but she clearly thinks he's a total drip. He will chase her sometimes and she will run - to a point. I have found the mom cat standing over the alpha male, just reading him the riot act a few times, very loudly and very angrily. And he lays on the floor, avoids looking at her, and just takes it. So I feel confident that if he really gets on her nerves, she'll let him know that she's not happy. Personally, I think he now just wants to play with her and she's letting him know that he is not forgiven for the way he treated her when she first started to live there.

Hang in there, MommaCat. Letting them work it out is 75% of what it takes - the other 25% is lots of love and attention from you..

[MommaCat]

Hi Sweetie's Mom!
THank you so much for your encouraging words! Do you REALLY think she will calm down an dlearn to at least tolerate Clayton?

Yesterday, my husband came home.... SHadow (Calico) had thrown up... she does this alot... he said that's it.. and took the litter box that had been in the powder room for her and threw it out.
WHOA... I said I hope she is brave enough enough to go in the basement where Clayton hangs out....I am still spraying FELIWAY everywhere. She is still hiding behind my husband's desk in his study. Clayton.. the little devil.. will sit just outside my husband's study door. he KNOWS that Shedow is behind "Dad's desk.. he doesn't cross over the threshold.. he just sits there. I told my husband, I htink he wants to play. Jim is not too sure. He thinks CLayton likes to tormnet her by psyching her out.
She follows JIm all over the place in the morning while he is getting ready for work.. like Daddy will protect her.

Iam now on my second bottle of Feliway... I am going to start to drink this stuff soon myself!

I think Clayton is lonely and just wants to play... my husband is not so sure. Clayton is still keeping me up half the night. he has NO ONE to play with during the day. So he waits until I am in bed... and then he wants to play. Jim plays with him with a laser light.... that only reves his little engines up! He is the most adorable child...I love both my furbabies....both have blest us and enriched our lives beyond measure.... I just wish Clayton woul dlet his Momma get some sleep!

THank you so much Sweetie's Mom for all you support.
Blessings,
Momma Cat... Deb

[Sweetie's Mom]

Ha! The laser light makes my cats very tired! They all settle down after playing with it for about 10-15 minutes.

MommaCat, I had the same nighttime problems with 2 of my cats. Especially the alpha male. He would want to play about 2 a.m. every morning! I just wasn't getting enough sleep. So I finally started getting up when he came in at 2 a.m. and carrying him to the bedroom door, set him outside the bedroom door, closed the door and went back to sleep. Eventually, he changed his habits to not waking me til 6 a.m. Now it's between 6 and 7 a.m. which is more acceptable. He's like my alarm clock now. I like to get up by 7:00 most days and I never set my alarm! I depend on Wooz to wake me and he never fails.

My alpha male, Wooz, also sits and stares at the mom cat whom he used to chase and be nasty to. It doesn't bother her much anymore - she's good at ignoring him now.

Good luck!

[sweet_stormy]

there must be something with cats that have calico in them that makes them all act the same (well, most of them). i have a calico mix (stormy) and she doesnt really like my kitten Mittens. she will hiss at mittens all the time and mittens will try an trip stormy. stormy has calmed down a lot since i got mittens. Stormy never hissed at Smokey (unless he was trying to do "stuff" to her that she didnt want, and they are brother and sister). Smokey and Stormy have been there for each other since day 1.
give your furrbabies some time. its harder for your calico in some ways to cope with the new kitty in the house because she is so old (not to be mean) and it sounds like she doesn't want the "little twerp" to take over her home.

[MommaCat]

Dear Mom,
You are SO RIGHT!
I have a friend that is an animal communicator and when Shdow talks to her she tells Arlene that she wants HIM GONE! Shadow says that this is "her house.. Her people".
Arlene has tried to tell her that we adopted her when she needed a loving home and Clayton wa shurt like her and wanted to comehere too. She just closes her little ears. She is NOT one share I guess.
I have heard over the years that Calicos all have issues... all I know I have a pip! I wouldn't trade her for the world and I adore her.... but she is really testing her Momma...typical "teenager". She'll be 14 next month.
You are so right Clayton is the twerp in her eyes. We and the vet made him 6... going on 7 in June. I gave him my great grandfather's birthday as when I adopted him the SPCA had already named him, and CLAYTON was my grandmother's maiden name....he is so loving.. he loves to climb all over me ALL NIGHT LONG... I haven't figured this out yet.. I guess he wants to be sure I am still here and won't scream at him... I just pet him in my sleep deprived state. He is smart enough tho NOT to bug Daddy.
They are still hissing at each other....our vet has three cats and told me that hers fight every day.... ohh that was encouraging!
I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have all of you to bounce things off of... I'd probably be bouncing off the walls!
I feel like this is my kitty support group!
THank yo so much for being here... You are an angel. PLEASE give your bbaies a hug for me.
Blessings,
Mommacat.. Deb

[catcrazylady]

For some reason I'm just finding this thread! I hang out in general to much and miss everything else that is going on!

It's nice to meet you momma cat! They call me CCL for short around here. I have a tortie with an attitude! She growls and hisses at everybody! She is three now and I don't expect things to change. All of my nine have very unique personalities and with each addition I have just let them work out their own pecking order. Eventually things will settle down and they will work out the best way to share the house. There will probably always be spats here and there but we humans are no different.

I know it's stressful but I really wouldn't be too concerned. They will come to some kind of an agreement. They may never be good friends no matter how bad you want that. At least they both have a wonderful and loving home. Time, time, and more time is what you need. I have had to endure this lots of times over and it always works out in the end. Just relax and let them follow the path they need to in order to adjust. As long as no fur is flying and no stitches are required then they are doing very well together!!

Give them lots of hugs and kisses and keep us posted on the progress!!