Personal advice re:rude comments from children

[Tonya]

I like your explanation, Karen. I think I may give that one a shot.

Thank you, everyone.

The world is so sad that we have to tiptoe around such things as this.

That is for sure.

[Twisterdog]

How can I explain to him that it is inappropriate to refer to nationality and skin colors so much without getting to deep?

But IS it inappropriate? Says who? By telling your child that the words "black" or "Chinese" are inappropriate and not something to be said in public, are you not, in effect, telling your child that they are something to be ashamed of, something inferior and hurtful ... like calling someone stupid or ugly?

To a young child who is raised without prejudice and bigotry, the words "black" or "Chinese" are simply facts, not insults ... just like the words "tall" or "blue-eyed" would be. I think you should congratulate yourself on the fact that your child sees nothing derogatory in these terms.

This is probably a phase your child is going through. Kids have to learn to organize the chaos that is their world, because for a child, the world gets a little bigger and a little more confusing every day.

Perhaps you could simply redirect your child's train of thought. When he says, "That black man over there has a cute dog.", you could say, "Which man? The man with the blue coat on? Yes, the tall man in the blue coat does have a cute dog!" If he sees race is not always the first/most important identifying characteristic, he will unconsciously start to mimic that phrasing.

[jenluckenbach]

Perhaps you could simply redirect your child's train of thought. When he says, "That black man over there has a cute dog.", you could say, "Which man? The man with the blue coat on? Yes, the tall man in the blue coat does have a cute dog!" If he sees race is not always the first/most important identifying characteristic, he will unconsciously start to mimic that phrasing.

EXCELLENT!!!!!
You are either a very good parent or someone who will be in the future.

[Tonya]

EXCELLENT!!!!!

You are either a very good parent or someone who will be in the future.

I agree! Good advice.

[Twisterdog]

You are either a very good parent or someone who will be in the future.

*blushes*

Thanks!

(Although sometimes I'm sure my twelve year old son would NOT agree with that statement at all!)

[Kater]

Originally posted by jenluckenbach
You are either a very good parent or someone who will be in the future.

Twisterdog, you have always given me this same impression. Your son is very lucky! (he'll appreicate it later...)

[2kitties]

Also let Jayden know that people should ideally be identified by who they are on the inside. We should all strive to identify one another by what we do, not what we see. And, if we only see what is on the outside, we miss so much of what makes us all special.