Originally posted by popcornbird
Honestly, while I'm pretty sure this is not something you'd want to hear, it is something I really feel the need to say.

Cass...you're not just any 'free-of-responsibility' 25 year old. You're a 25 year old woman with a child. You are a mother. You have responsibility...and in all honesty, I believe you should take care of that responsibility above everything. Your innocent, young child, should come before everything at this point. Sure, if you're taking care of your child and doing all you can to be responsible for your child, go and have all the 'fun' you want. It just saddens me that we don't hear about him anymore, and I wonder how or where he is. I can't seem to comprehend how the mother of a toddler can have time for this sort of fun anyway. Dylan is your responsibility. You need to be there for him all the time. You're his mother. He's just a toddler, and at an age when children NEED their mother, more than anyone in the world. Toddlers need their mother...more than their father, more than their siblings, more than their grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc. Moms come first to such young children, and when you're a mom, you should be responsible about everything in your child's life before thinking about getting involved in relationships JUST for fun and not out of sincerity for the long-run. If it was out of sincerity, I would take it differently...but when its JUST for fun and you have a child that should be your full-time responsibility right now,...well...that just makes me feel something. Just my honest opinion...and I hope you don't take this negatively. It is said only out of concern.
You obviously think I am pretty out of it to have posted this. OF COURSE my son comes first! He has me and his father. He has what he needs. I can have all the fun I want. I am going to do what *I* want to do. It's not like I'm going to be introducing him to Dylan. I am not. I don't introduce anyone to Dylan. I keep that out of our relationship. Age has nothing to do with that issue either. It wouldn't matter if the person I was dating is 29, 40 whatever. But right now in my life I DO NOT want anything serious. Yes, I just want to have fun and why the heck should I deny myself that kind of happiness? I don't want a relationship right now. Nor do I plan on having one for a long time. I don't NEED one, and frankly I don't see how this is any different than hanging out with any person who is a guy/friend.

This isn't about my personal life. It's about a question I had regarding age differences, not my parenting choices. If you wish to talk about that you can PM me. Dylan doesn't live with me right now and that is good for him. He lives with his dad. It's more convenient for him. I am NOT taking him out of his house where he is comfortable. Maybe one day but at this time it's not what is best for him. He needs to be comfortable. And frankly I don't see how anyone who hasn't had a child and left an unstable relationship can have room to talk. You do not know what it is like to be a mother.

Just because I don't post about him anymore doesn't mean he isn't well cared for. I am a very busy person. I have a job, pets to care for, a child to raise. I can't sit here on Pet Talk all day with daily accounts of what goes on in my life. And if you payed attention to my threads you would see I have posted photos of Dylan not too long ago. I do not have my own computer and can only upload photos when I have the chance to use my roomates. Right now I am stuck on a very old computer in the living room lucky enough to be able to post here. I am sorry I do not update on my son, but I don't think I should have to.

Plus I'm very active in another online community now, and I usually update there. I am sharing custody. I do have time for a social life, and even if I had Dylan full time I would make sure I had a social life, because if anyone denyed themselfs that it would drive them crazy. I don't think going out a couple of times a week to see a movie, or hanging out with your best friend on the weekend means I am neglecting my child.