I agree that you do have to let them work it out (within reason).

I guess you'd say we are kind of going through the same thing with Bon and Huney.
A couple of weeks ago he took her bone and when I took it from him and gave it back to her, he grabbed her neck. He was growling, but not bad but he definately didn't want to let go.
Needless to say now Huney doesn't want any really good treats while he is in the house. She is just so meek.
I started putting him in his kennel when they are given good treats (pigs ears & such) but she won't eat a treat then either. So I just let him outside with Roxey and she gets a special treat and gets to have some Mommy & me time
But he's so good now, he'll just walk into his kennel when I give him a treat and eat it in there.

Sorry to go on about my two, just wanted you to know yours isn't the only house that goes on in