Thanks to everyone for responding. I know it was a lot all at once!

I am going to try cleaning Lucky and PB's ears with the ear cleaner with mite stuff in it. I figure it can't hurt! The stuff is dry and rough right outside their ears. I know with mites or dirty ears it's usually dark colored. Donna I had never thought of a yeast infection. All I can say is Lord please help hubby and I deal with Peanut Butter!
Thanks VermontCat for the advice on warm mist for Abigail. I just want to make things easier for her if I can.
RedHedd I'll get started with Neosporin right away! Thanks
Lorraine I'll try the Peroxide and then use the Neosporin. Thanks for the hugs because they all decided to try my nerves at once today!

Thanks everybody!!!