I am sorry that you are going through this. My parents are also divorced and my husbands parents are divorced. It is so hard to spend time with everyone and make sure that everyone is happy. Since they cannot be together, I suggest alternating years. Spend one year with one parent, the next year with the other. Perhaps you can see one parent on Christmas Eve and one on Christmas day like everyone suggested.

Whatever you decide, do not let guilt get to you. It is not your fault or your problem. You will be miserable if you spend the rest of your life worrying about how to deal with special occasions.

I've finally after years of stressing decided that I'm not going to let it be my problem any longer. For now on, I'll invite both of them to the function. If one of them chooses not to show up, it's their problem. I am not the one that got a divorce. I'm sick of having 3-4 birthday parties for my son, multiple Christmas celebrations, etc...