Terri I am a little late reading your post and am very glad I don't have to go into work today as it would take a bit to compose myself. How terribly, terribly sad and such a shock for you! I have lost furkids under a planned, controlled situation (at the vet's) but also lost my beloved Whitney very suddenly at the age of 8. Though neither way is easy, I think the suddenness of a pet death shakes one to the core maybe just a bit more. I am glad to read that you are now able to sit back and reflect on happier times and the joy that Otis gave you in life. That is what keeps us going. There will of course be times when the tears will start (mine can still come and it's been years) but your memories will always be there for you to draw on. God bless you.