My advise is go back and read previous posts where you have sought advise for same related problems and review posters suggestions. There have been allot of good ideas and sharing of stories. Maybe a refresher of these posts will help you and your hubby see things clearier. I know it's been mentioned before, if it's better for your situation to rehome the kitty that's ok. No one will think bad of you. Please consider a non kill shelter or rescue organization.