Originally posted by gini
Deb, my heart goes out to you and your husband in this loss.

I know that Dennis will be happy to be back home with you too, in just a few days.

In all that he has tried to do for everyone else, the fact remains that he has lost HIS father and it wasn't any easier for him.

May his father rest now, in peace.
gini - I really appreciate your comments SOOO much. I think he has just been so focused on mediating, that he has had no time to grieve and you are exactly right about that.
On the other hand - I am up here in Ohio - also trying to keep calm and strong for my husband - and now that his father is gone, I am finding that now *I* am starting to crumble, feel angry at the family for being so difficult, aggravated that my husband is always the calm and stable one. I guess perhaps now it is MY turn to be selfish.

One thing he and I discussed during this time is the urgency of prepaying and settling all of our death and burial arrangements just as soon as he is back in town. We know what we want and need to finalize our plans - to avoid the mess that he has had to deal with down in Texas.

Our beliefs are very simple - we are Christians and neither of us desire a funeral, only a Gospel message for the living at church with no dead bodies present. We want to be cremated.

Again - thank you for your most thoughtful comments! All of the calm and strength he has presented down there does not remove the fact that he has indeed lost HIS dad. He will come home and need his time for private grieving, although I know most of it has been done in advance since the illness was so long. He says he feels very much at peace - just very exhausted and wants to come home.