Hi Jackie,
Here goes.....

Let's get the sleeping thing sorted and out the way. It really amazes me that so many people find this a major point of living with a dog!
I am sure you are aware of the basic pack structure - Alpha being in charge etc. Problems can arise when owners see themselves as Alpha in a exclusive relationship with each dog. In your situation Perry is being very tough and macho. He is displaying to Daisy with soft toys to impress her with his aggression and ferocity and she seems pretty willing to accept this situation - everyone is happy. Daisy is happy to follow his lead and help him get rid of the kids that walk past the house and generally do what he wants and Perry is happy that all that macho b******t worked and he is top dog.
To help Perry, and Daisy, to keep their relationship happy and the household in general more peaceful you must reinforce Perry's view of the world as far as his relationship with Daisy goes. If he is secure then he will have no need to display to keep the status quo. The more dominant dog, by right, always has the best sleeping place. As Daisy has this position it undermines Perry and puts pressure on him to reassert himself.
By subtle differences in your behaviour towards the dogs as a pack rather than to each as individual a lot of this pressure can be taken from the dogs. (Not having dogs on the beds or furniture is my number one tip!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) Greeting Perry first, allowing him through the door before Daisy and putting his food down before Daisy's all will help establish the pack as a stable unit where everyone is secure and feels safe.

Perry seems to lack basic self control - this is not the end of the world and can be taught if you are willing to put the time into it and be totally consistent.

Let's start with barking and going loopy when there is someone at the door. Perry just doesn't realise that there is another way of coping with life at the moment. He needs to be shown this in a very calm and controlled way. (Two of you working on this would be great.) Let me know if this is something you would like to work on, it is very succesful and rewarding.

Barking at the kids going past is a very rewarding behaviour for Perry. It is fun, exciting, Daisy supports him and it works - the kids go away! You, again, must show him that there is another way to deal with this. As soon as he starts to bark at kids passing remove Daisy and yourselves from the room. Stay away for at least three minutes after he has stopped and totally ignore him when you come back in. (This will not stop him as it is still a self rewarding behaviour but it gives him the message that nobody in the pack is going to pay any attention or help in any way.) When you have resumed what you were doing before you left the room and as long as Perry is not asking for attention call him over, ask him to sit and then reward him with loads of praise. Do this EVERY time for four to five days.
Now you want to actually stop him barking and you have shown him what will get a reward from you (if his soft toys are his favourite thing the reward could be that you throw one for him - NOT tugging it with him). Leave his lead on when you are in the house with him (this will also help any bad associations he has with it). This means you can take control without yelling or touching him. As soon as he starts to bark remove Daisy from the room and gently take up the lead. You will need to put some pressure on it to encourage him to respond and use a very calm voice. use the same commands that you used previously -"Perry, come." If he doesn't respond increase the pressure on the lead and repeat. The first few times you will probably get no response until the kids are out of sight but you must carry on until he comes to you. It is VITAL that you remain calm and keep your voice at the same level no matter how long it takes! When he comes to you let the lead go slack and tell him to sit. He must maintain this position for two to three minutes before the reward is given. Even as you praise him stay calm. Eventualy he will be coming to your voice before the kids are out of sight - introduce food treats if you like to use them. It will get better and better - keep a timed record of how long he takes to respond so you can see your progress. It really does work and you will be so proud of yourself and Perry. Have a go and let me know how it goes and then with this success we will go onto his meeting other dogs and people.

You are brilliant to love your dogs enough to want the best for them and he will be a much happier boy when he realises that life isn't just about worry and anxiety!

This is the great advice that I got from Carrie, and I thought if anyone else had the same problem maybe they would benefit from her words of wisdom. We are going to see if we can help Perry take his rightful place as Mr. Alpha.