The situation there sounds totally overwhelming! Thank you for helping the kittens you have already helped. It's hard to accepot, but sometimes there is only SO MUCH one person can do! Are there no rescue organisations in your area who will help with the costs? I have a wonderful vet here who drops his prices really low for my TNRs, although it still costs me a bit, it's not as much as if it was a pet.

It sounds like you have done as much as you can - you need to remember the words of this poem by Jim Willis:

If you consider that we cannot save them all,
and what difference does one make?
you ought to know the joy of the one who is saved.
Mourne those we cannot save, it is a eulogy to their being.
Do not let their loss be in vain.

Be kind to yourself, remember your needs
and those of your family and friends of every species.
If you give everything, what will you have left for yourself, or for them?
Srtive to be happy and healthy. You are needed.
Achieving balance in life is a lifelong struggle.
We who help those who do not have all that they need
should be among the most grateful for what we have.

If anger wells up within you, because people are the problem,
remember your humanity, and that people are also the solution.

(((HUGS))) to you for all you have done, and are doing, for these precious kitties.