Good point, Catnapper. I have a similar situation, in that I can do nothing in regards to my husband's ex and the decisions about his children either. Darn it! I am opinionated and want to state my case! Although I go through nothing like you do, I still completely understand the comparison you are making and that's why I'm ok with "unions" between two people, regardless of their sex, so that they can be recogognized in legal proceedings, insurance, medical emergencies, etc. It's just the official "marriage" part that I am having trouble with. But I'm trying.