As far as the bathroom lap kitties - this is a story I could ONLY tell in this forum - I had adopted a kitty who showed up on my porch, and I guess he was so happy to have a family again, he was constantly in my lap - but when I went to the bathroom, he took one look at my panties around my knees and decided they would make a good hammock, and jumped in and curled up!

As far as the shredded hands, about five years ago I was working a part-time second job at a convenience store, and a customer came in and said "Either you work on your own car or you have a cat". I said, "Well, both, but how did you know?" He said, "Your torn-up hands!"