I'm so glad this joke thread is still going strong after so long! Great idea, Popcornbird!

Super additions, trayi52 . . .

A man strolling through the woods comes across another man hugging a tree with his ear pressed firmly against the bark. He inquires, "Just out of curiosity, what the hell are you doing?"

"I'm listening to the music of the tree."

"You've got to be kiddin' me!"

"No, I'm not . . . why not give it a try?"

So the curious guy wraps his arms around the tree and presses his ear up to the bark. The other man quickly handcuffs his wrists, steals his watch, wallet, car keys and strips him naked before leaving.

A few hours pass, when another nature lover comes upon the handcuffed victim. "What the hell happened to you?" asks the hiker.

The handcuffed man proceeds to tell him the whole story, after which the man shakes his head in sympathy, walks around behind him, kisses him behind the ear and says,

"This just ain't your day."