Excuse me "do what she stells you"!!! are you Ray and is her name Marie? I had the problem for a time between hubbys folks and mine. Where is christmas going to be, I just told them both I need to start myn own family traditon if they want to come visit I give them, each, a day when we would be there as a faimly all day. If that day doesn't work oh well . It solved 15 years of my kids feeling like Christmas was nothing but a hated time of the year. You get grumbles the 1st year but stick to it and the next year the get on board for the time with you.