Pepper, you will make it through, it's not very easy but you have shown how strong you are in loving and caring for Bourbon. Some people just don't understand the bond that develops between people and dogs or cats or whatever a person loves. I think sometimes it's stronger than a person to person bond.
Right now it's so painful to think about, but as Purrley says eventually you will think about Bourbon and remember all the wonderful times you had together.
We lost our very first Schnauzer, Kona who was 15 last October. We had to take her to the Vet and put her to sleep and I didn't think I would ever get over it. Everytime I saw another dog I would cry, eventually we started to remember the funny things she would do and we would laugh and how she loved to play. After grieving for a period of time, you will remember Bourbon for the fun things he did and probably how he loved to eat or play. Just give yourself some time.
Jackie