Sweet Tanya. I think we all have that feeling when we lose our babies. "I can't put myself through this again." Within two years I lost three furkids and I said to myself the very same words. "I can't do this anymore." But before long there was another lab puppy, then another kitty and then a guinea pig hogging the bed.

Unfortunately for us humans, being the gurardians of these incredible spirits is an incredibly beautiful, yet at the same time, painful experience. They bring immeasureable joy and love and comfort into our lives every day that they are with us. But it is always with the knowledge, that in all liklihood, our best friends will pass over before us. But, it is my belief, that God entrusts to us the care of these beautiful souls. And in return for all they so selflessly give to us during their time here on earth, we have to endure the pain and sorrow of losing them. That's the bargain. But what would they do if they did not have us to care for and love them? They truly do count on us to be strong!!

As difficult as it seems right now, there will be a day, hopefully in the not too distant future, when you will feel the need to fill that big hole in your heart with another needy pup who wants nothing more than to share your love. Rocky's passing was so tragically sudden and shocking that I think you need a bit more time for it all to truly become real. You have to allow yourself time to grieve. As many of us have said, even years later the pain does not completely go away. More like a dull ache. But OH! those precious memories of happy days and laughter. I wouldn't trade one of those memories for anything on earth.

And your poor little Schnauzer! Sounds like he misses Rocky as much as you. Daycare seems to keep him busy and occupied. I'm not sure how feasible it is for you to bring him there every day. Is there another family member who can "take him" during the day when you are at work? Of course, you know many of us here would say that having another doggie pal at home would probably be a great comfort to him. But only you will know when the time is right. They truly grieve just as we do. For weeks after my Jingles passed, my husky/shep Cody howled constanly, searching the dunes at the beach where she and Jing would romp and play and swim. Not until Star, her new lab sister, entered the clan, did she begin to accept the loss of her best friend.

Tanya, I had Jingles individually cremated and her ashes placed in a beautiful urn. I had one of my favorite pictures of her painted onto the urn by a friend who is an artist. The urn sits in my sunroom; her favorite room. Always surrounded by fresh flowers. It may sound silly to you, but I talk to her there every morning when I have coffee. I tell her EVERYTHING! She is still my closest confidant. If you have a home with a yard (maybe you and Rocky had a special, quiet or pretty place where you spent time) burying his ashes somewhere where you can sit quietly and visit might be something you could consider. It is such a personal choice.

Please give yourself time Tanya. Surround yourself with people who love you and who loved Rocky. And talk about him. He was such an important part of your life. And while his physical body may no longer be with you, his beautiful spirit and your precious memories will live forever in your heart.

Love and prayers that God gives you strength to get through this very difficult time. You know we're all here for you.
Sandra