Dearest Abby and Jack, you are adorable indeed! Both of you are absolutely precious, especially all dressed up in those great costumes! You're both gorgeous to begin with, Abby the Scottish Terrier and Jack the Beagle mix that you are. And what delightful personalities you have, too! Abby, you're a real sweetheart, putting up with all the treatments you need for your allergies. Jack, a.k.a. "One-Eyed Jack," after you'd been abused so badly you lost an eye, you were rescued by the SPCA, where you and your dear people met and adopted each other. Now you're the most affectionate doggie and you love to cuddle! You all love each other very much, don't you. What a wonderful love-filled home you share!
Congratulations, darling Abby and Jack, on being chosen Dogs of the Day! We hope you and your dear people and all your family and friends are enjoying a fine celebration, full of fun and lovies and all your favorite games and treats.
I meant," said Ipslore bitterly, "what is there in this world that truly makes living worthwhile?"
Death thought about it.
CATS, he said eventually. CATS ARE NICE.
-- Terry Pratchett (1948—2015), Sourcery
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