Thanks Karen and cassiesmom. I'll consider it, the list I mean. If she does dishes, there's always dried food left on the plates and cutlery, yuuuck. If she crams them in the dishwasher there's also too much food on them and I gotta do it myself anyway. She does lift her feet up whilst I vaccume however. She'll just ignore a list, I'll get angry. There's no point, that's 30 yrs. of experience talking. I'm just going to do the same as usual, try and get her to clean up after herself and let the rest go. We won't let her come back for a VERY long time after this, at least a year. I'll try and change as much as I can, I don't expect she'll change much...😂