Cat determined not to like us :(

[mrspunkysmom]

Did you say how old she was? Cats also grieve for their former owners. I tried to rehome RB Maggie years back and she lasted a week with the other lady. i had never heard of cat grieving until that time. Later Maggie lived mother, but Maggie knew mother.

Callie, my bedroom feral, doesn't like me. I can give her scritches from a distance. Crazy I know.

Keep at it. At least she is out and working with Phinehas.

[Jessika]

Her entire world has been turned upside down. New sights, new smells, new routines, new people... it can be very overwhelming for kitties... and some kitties are a LOT more sensitive to change than others.

My first piece of advice for you is to look into getting a Feliway diffuser for the laundry room (or whichever room she is kept in/hangs out in the most). It emits feline phermones that have a calming effect on them.

And some cats will just always be timid and won't come out around people... and that's ok.

It may take awhile... when I brought my feral kitty home, I pretty much ignored her for the first month or two and did not try interacting with her. I let her come out on her own terms and do what she was comfortable with doing. Slowly but surely she would start coming out when I was awake in my room... but if I stood up, moved, turned to look at her, etc, she'd run right back into the closet to hide. Eventually she started sleeping with me, and not running away and finally let me pet her... and from there we were inseparable.

I hope I'm understanding correctly in the sense that you have her confined to ONE room and not the run of the house? Allowing them access to an entire house right away can be extremely overwhelming, so sometimes keeping them confined to just one room for awhile will help and then slowly allowing them out to explore other areas.

So... TL;DR: It can take some time for her to warm up. Try using a Feliway diffuser (can find on amazon or at local pet stores). Don't force affection; let her come around on her terms, not yours.

I know know frustrating it can be. Just be consistent and persistent, but most importantly... don't give up!

[Freedom]

As Jessika said, this is a huge change for Phinehas. She has lost the only human she ever knew, along with her home, routines, and so on. Lots of grieving as well a a shock - hey, no one asked HER if she wanted this change! She may not realize she CAN trust humans in general. So that trust needs to build and develop.

I also agree with using the Feliway, though others on here have found the diffuser is a waste, you need the pheronomes to be confined more. One room, and work to getting her a collar with a sleeve and spraying on the sleeve (never directly spray the cat) so the calming sense is always around her.

You can also try sitting with some really yummy treats to share with her and other cats. Salmon is a great one. Let her see the other cats interacting with you in a positive way, with no 'hurt' happening.

[Jessika]

I also agree with using the Feliway, though others on here have found the diffuser is a waste, you need the pheronomes to be confined more. One room, and work to getting her a collar with a sleeve and spraying on the sleeve (never directly spray the cat) so the calming sense is always around her.

The diffusers are not meant for a large area, certainly not for the whole house, hence why I suggested to use it in the room she is being confined in.

[wolflady]

Thanks for all the points of view and experiences. I sure hope she does warm up to us. We do have the diffuser in the room where we initially had her when we brought her home. After we hadn't made any progress after about a month, I finally opened the door to the "cat room" to the rest of the house. This seems to be better because I have actually seen her a few times now and I even snuck in a quick petting this morning when I found her sitting on a chair. She tolerated it for a few seconds and then took off, but that was some progress! She still pretty much just runs and hides when anybody gets near her, but hopefully she'll warm up. She and Phinehas seem perfectly fine together, but she's not quite the "kitty buddy" that I was looking for for Phinehas. Maybe her personality will come out a little more as she (hopefully) warms up to us and becomes part of our family!

[Karen]

Good to hear! Progress is nice to hear, and it will surely get better as time goes on!

[phesina]

That's progress! Great news! It sounds like she is taking little steps here. Sometimes it can take a very long time, but it will be so worth it, time so well spent.

Keep on keeping on, all! (What is the new kitty's name, by the way?)

Love and good wishes. God bless.