Originally Posted by kittykatharine
and she was looking into our eyes and slowly letting go. She gasped for air a few times, but remained calm and listened to our voices and she slowly and peacefully went to the rainbow bridge.
This has been the saddest day of my life and I cannot express how heart broken I am to have lost my child. We worked so hard and for so many years to keep her alive, and to have her succumb to a respiratory infection is more than devastating. I feel as if my world has been turned up side down and I am living in this parallel universe that doesn't really exist.
I cannot believe she is gone and my mom and I are just shattered that out little baby is no longer here. The house seems so empty, my chest seems so hollow, and I just can't believe I have to live the rest of my life with out my baby. She gave us purpose, she gave us strength, she gave us so much that we will always remember just how special she was. If you are reading this - I hope you can relate to how much we loved our kitty. As our kitties are our family.If loved could have saved you Sydney - you would have lived forever. [Broken hearted - and sobbing profusely]
First of all my condolences for your loss. (I haven't even been able to come back to PT for a month-due to the grief)
I cannot tell you how much I empathize with what you have written, as such a similar event happened to Bella and I only one day before you posted this.
Bella too, had cancer in her sinus (and on the top of her head) It was Squamous Cell Carcinoma, usually found on the ears, nose of white cats. It is usually sun damage related. My radiation oncologist had never seen a cat with it in the head, only dogs.
I too spent over $12,000 on radiation and had started chemo protocol.
Unlike Sydney's case, Bella was gone within 11 weeks of the first sign of disease, a tiny lump on her head.
Bella's passing was exactly like Sydney's. She lay quiet without moving all day. I covered her with blanket. I knew it was a vigil. The vets were supposed to come to my house the following day, but I knew she wouldn't make it. I could not bear the thought of putting her in the car, which she hated. I only prayed for a peaceful crossing.
Just as you said, Bella was breathing shallow. I spoke to her in her ear, I told her to let go. I told her I would find her, and we'd be together forever. One Fine Day. She gasped a few times and was gone. Bella wasn't even 9 years old.
I am so comforted that you had your mom with you.
I don't have anyone at all.
I can relate exactly to how you feel about your home without Sydney now, because I feel the same.
PM me if you wish.
With you, in heartbreak.
Rose
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