Hi Charlie,
Don't worry about a thing, I'll take your case pro bono. Why is your Meowmie denying you chicken? This is definitely unacceptable! We need to talk as soon as possible so we can discuss your unfortunate situation and decide on our strategy. You are most certainly being aboosed. I'll have my purralegal start the legal research and I'll call you on your cell phone. Hang on, help is on the way!
Your friend,
Groucho the Lawyer
Practice Limited to Kitty Krimes and Aboose
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