Rhi, when Mandy died, I thought I would never recover. I lost pets before and after her, but that was the worst. You feel like a piece of your heart has been ripped out, if not your whole heart. It will take time, but it will get easier. I got this in a card from my vets when Mandy died...

Grieve not, nor speak of me with tears,
But laugh and talk of me as if I were beside you.
I loved you so...T'was heaven here with you.

Clover will always be with you. I still talk about Mandy, as well as other furkids who are at the Bridge, always will. {hugs}