September 20th, 2010... the day my world crumbled apart..

[Karen]

Ariel Samantha is pretty, and I am glad you did get the book amidst all you things! I'll prompt Richard to PM you the address of "who's next" in case he doesn't see this!

[Husky_mom]

I think I´m having some sort of postpartum depression.. only this one is prepartum.. or something like that...

I´m excited about our baby.. but I just don´t feel "as" excited... whenever I see something cute.. or even think about her.. I think about what the hubs might think and cry...and obviously get sad...

I miss his hand rubbing my belly.. and I´m starting to hate people rubbing it.. it´s got to the point it makes me feel uncomfortable...

I also hate when my mom rubs my hand or wants to hug me.. (I know she means good, and while I´ve never been too keen or tolerant to touching, lately it´s started to irritate me even more)...

I´ve lost interest in certain things.. like "why should i bother doing this or that... hubby is no longer here" (gross example.. shaving my legs.. and some other meaningless stuff)..

the kids have been a huge motivator.. but it´s hard not having him around..

and I really thank you all for still being here and keeping us in your thoughts and prayers...believe me you´ve helped me so much already..

[Karen]

Isabel, love, maybe you should find a professional counselor to talk to, someone not related, to help you through this. Hopefully someone you could see while your son is at school, even a clergy person might be helpful, just someone to talk about everything. Your situation is just about as stressful as could be, so getting some help is nothing to be ashamed of.

[dukedogsmom]

I'm so sorry! I haven't been here in a while and am just seeing this. I can't imagine your pain. But you also have a blessing, as well. I agree with Karen. Don't be afraid/ashamed to get some help. You've been through a lot. Would you please PM me with your address? I'd love to make you a card. I'm at a loss as to what else to say because words can only help so much. Just know we're here for you.

[lvpets2002]

I so aggree with Karen.. Honey please do talk to your preist or a professional counselor.. I so wish I could just hugg you & sit with you to listen too.. If I could I would be there in a minute.. Yes can you send PM me your current address so I can send you something.. Also give me your phone # & I can call only if you wish.. Sending Lots more Huggss & Prayers Isabel.. Now just take it all slow & easy..

Isabel, love, maybe you should find a professional counselor to talk to, someone not related, to help you through this. Hopefully someone you could see while your son is at school, even a clergy person might be helpful, just someone to talk about everything. Your situation is just about as stressful as could be, so getting some help is nothing to be ashamed of.

[Freedom]

Isabel, I wish I could just reach through the monitor and across space and give you a heart - felt hug! OH, no wait, you aren't really enjoying being touched and hugged just now, oops, sorry!

I suspect that everything you are feeling is quite appropriate and normal just now. You are in the midst of a hug emotional turmoil, a roller coaster of feelings. And I agree with the others, you may want to consider talking with someone. Having a new baby on thee way, which both of you were so excited about, can only be entwined with the grief. I continue to keep you in my prayers.

[Lilith Cherry]

Lots of love Isabel but no touchy feely stuff until you feel able to stand it ! I am sure it is normal to feel the way you do right now but I also think talking to someone outside your family circle could probnably help relieve some of the stress. You and the the kids are always in our hearts

[Husky_mom]

today marks a month of his passing.. and it ain´t got any easier..

my heart aches just as the first day... I just love him so much... I know he´s in a much better place now.. worry free and pain free...

I´m still on a denial state.. I think.. I just don´t want to make it real.. it just hurts so much as it is...

it´s worse when it´s not expected IMO... we had so much ahead of us.. and now it´s just me... now i have to keep on for our kids.. and it´s no piece of cake..

*can´t type more...can´t see anything anyway.. bbl..*