Ciggies? Puhleez! This is massively corrupt and politically anal England, could’ve nabbed myself packs of them under the age of 16.

I suppose now we have lost Sara, I am the new lady in your online life? Sweet. Sorry I can’t regularly come around to play, though, most of the time I’ve got to go on my merry way of Anglicisms.

I am sorry you think adulthood consists only of those things. I was thinking more along the career and prosperity lines, but then perhaps I’m not cut out for this adult stuff huh?

The small-mindedness of the pair of you beggars belief.

I don’t totally understand your grudge, RICHARD - I misinterpreted a question you posed to me on health systems, and now you hate my guts? Eesh. I return no such qualms with you.

A real woman? Oh no, apparently I can’t be one of those, for I am tall and skinny and am therefore a walking Barbie doll, who is actually not human but some genetically modified being created for the sole purpose of making real women feel bad. I apologise to real women everywhere!

Ah, sweeping generalisations. What fun!