Many thanks :)
To all who replied, I appreciate your thoughts, your hugs, your prayers and most of all your love.
It was a peaceful passing but that doesn't make the pain any less intense. On Friday morning when I got up I had no intention of making the decision that day. Thursday night he didn't eat so I thought I would leave it one more day and if he still didn't eat Friday night then I would call the vet.
I proceeded to get ready for work but before heading into the shower I reached down beside the bed (he loved being squeezed between the bed and the night table) I picked him up and as soon as I looked into his eyes I knew what I had to do. I emailed into work that I would not be in.
I called my neighbour Betty who came over to day good-bye. I called my Mom and she took a cab down here to say good-bye also. I wanted to be alone when he passed so Mom to a cab back home.
After Mom left, I took a brush to Max and brushed him all over. I wanted him to look nice when he met God. Then I sat down on the couch and held him close to my chest where he could feel my heart beat.
Dr. Singh and his assistant arrived at Noon. Max was given the sedative and he silently slipped into sleep. I held him and told him how much I loved him. I told him that I hoped I was the good Meowmie that he deserved. He was then given the final injection and he was gone. I held him for a few more minutes, I rocked him, kissed his little forehead and all of his feet and told him that I would see him when it is my time to go. He was placed in a box wrapped in warm blankets. After Dr Singh left, I fell apart - I fell to the floor and sobbed like a child. It's been so long since I've felt this kind of pain, this kind of emptiness, this kind of loneliness.
Anyway, I had to pull myself together and go to work in the afternoon where I was productive and focussed. However when I got home and opened the door, the apartment seemed so empty, so hollow. You all know what I mean and how I felt and still feel. Yes I know, the pain will subside and I will eventually fill the void with another rescue kitty but for now I grieve, and I grieve big time.
I will post pictures in the next reply.....
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, champagne in one hand and strawberries in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming WOO HOO - What a Ride!
--unknown
Sometimes the most real things in the world are the things we can't see
--Polar Express
Until one has loved an animal, part of their soul remains unawakened.
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