Laura's Babies
2. Instead of milk and cookies, Bubba Claus prefers that
children leave Coca Cola and pork rinds [or a Moon
Pie] on the fireplace. And Bubba doesn't smoke a pipe.
He dips a little snuff, though, so please have an empty
spittoon handy.
I'm sorry but you will have to amend provision 2 of your contract with North American Fairies and Elves Local 209. You will have to strike your reference to "Coca Cola " because no self respecting Bubba is going to drink "Coke" with a Moon Pie. Make it an RC Cola with that Moon pie.