Quote Originally Posted by anna_66 View Post
I say do what makes you happy. Life's too short not too. I'm sorry, I don't agree with just because your blood you should go to his party...especially if he's always putting you down. Sounds like his party would be a downer and I'd think if he treats you that way he more than likely wouldn't miss you being there. A card would be just fine in my opinion.

Good luck on whatever you choose to do
This is the best advice that you have gotten. I have decided to live my life in this manner: I do not do things because I feel guilty or obligated to do so. I do them because I do these things willingly and with love. That goes, especially, for my family. Just because someone is a family member it does not give them the right to treat you badly because, oh well, you love them anyway. Doesn't work like that.

If Gramps is a meanie and hurts you, then you have no obligation to him. If you enjoy time with your future mom-in-law then go with her and be joyful. You can call Gramps and wish him happy birthday and/or make time to see him seperately. You do not have to adjust your entire life to someone elses schedule. Blood is only thicker than water when it is full of love and mutual respect.

Sorry to sound severe, but it has been a lesson learned the hard way for me and I'm passing along my knowledge as I would to a daughter.

Stay strong!
Cathy