Dear Santa Claws,

My name is Mimi and I am probably too old to be writing to you, but I haven't asked for much over the years. I don't care about toys. And I can always find a place to sleep comfortably. But what about these dogs, especially that new one, Murphy, who is almost as old as me? She likes to chase me! And there is a cat in this house I don't like too. If you can't do anything about getting rid of them, would you consider a big sign, with neon lights, that says "NO DOGS OR BUTTER CATS ALLOWED"? That way, I could have the whole upstairs to myself and they would never be allowed to come up there. And while you're at it, would you please supply me with a huge case of Fancy Feast? I love canned cat food and mom is a bit stingy with it at times. And those blasted dogs like to eat it too!

Merry Christmas, Santa.
Your friend,
Mimi