I'm so sorry for your loss. I wish I could take away the pain but I can't. It will take time. Just try to remember the good times. You will never forget but with time, the pain will lessen. Jackie posted the perfect poem. Please read it and try to abide by it. I know how you feel. I lost Dusty and Lucky to untimely deaths. Please believe me: It is not your fault! I won't tell you not to mourn. Not to would be inhuman. But remember, you gave Rebel the happiest times he has ever experienced in his life. You, for a while, made a difference. Remember that. Rebel is having fun at the Rainbow Bridge. I'm sure he will be friends with my Lucky and Dusty.